The Hays family: underlying issues beneath apparent success

Family

The Hays family appears to be successful and normal on the surface. However, underneath it all are considerable issues which impact the quality of life of the individuals and their ability to cope with critical issues. The mother and father are Jack and Pam. They have been married for 50 years and started out with nothing by building a successful electronics business. They have three children Suzanne, Debbie and Cindy. Suzanne has a PHD in economics. Yet, she is very anti-social and judgmental of others. This has hurt the quality of her life and ability to receive promotions at work. Debbie has a law degree and used to practice as an attorney. However, in the last 10 years she has not worked and sits at home all day. Cindy is unable to walk and suffers from depression. She has issues related to her weight and works inside the family's store. She has only one friend and has never had a significant romantic relationship because of her physical / emotional issues. Jack and Pam are proud of their children and continue to believe that they are more than they really are. When the family gets together, everyone puts on and act to live these kinds of lifestyles. However, beneath the surface, they are all dealing with considerable challenges and not realizing what is happening.

A family assessment using the Family Systems Stressor-Strength Inventory (FS3I)

The FS3I is showing how the family is facing significant challenges which are impacting their underlying levels of mental health. This is based upon a number of stressors the most notable include: depression, delusional behavior, the failure to realistically face / deal with problems constructively and infighting among themselves. Under the FS3I approach, the perception scores are showing how each person suffers from different emotional hang-ups. Each person wants to appear to be more than they really are. Yet, the problem is that they will mask these insecurities to make themselves feel better. This is taking place with Jack and Pam believing that their kids can do no wrong because they have college degrees. However, beyond their education, each one of them has failed in their lives and wants to appear to be more successful than the others. (Kaakinen, 2010)

The family stressors are indicating that everyone suffers from a form of depression. This is because they are competing against each other and will hide what is happening with them. Jack and Pam encourage this behavior by enabling their kids through giving them added financial support. The kids are only there for their parents based upon what they can receive and often ignore them. Jack and Pam want someone to keep them company and connect with, now that they are becoming older. (Kaakinen, 2010)

The strengths of the family are that Jack and Pam encourage their children. This has helped them to do something with their lives to a certain extent. The result is that they were able to transform themselves. As all of them have the ability to obtain good jobs / careers in the process. (Kaakinen, 2010)

Conclusion

Clearly, the FS3I model is showing how the family is facing considerable challenges. This is because Cindy's disability has created a lack of accountability and everyone is in denial about what is happening. These variables are leading to increased amounts of delusional behavior from failing to address and deal with the long-term effects. Until they are able to do this, there is a realistic possibility the underling amounts of depression will become worse.