Aging in the World Today,

¶ … Aging

In the world today, it is a fact that human beings become far older than the case has ever been before. Medical science has enabled us to stay healthier and more productive for longer. Ironically, however, it is also true that human beings who become older tend to become frail, in need of care, and unproductive. Socially and financially this has become burdensome in a society where there has been an increasing burden on social systems like health care. It is also an unfortunate fact, however, that general perception of age has been shaped by the ideas surrounding these burdens. While many older people have the potential to remain productive for a long time after their retirement, the self-concept they have as a result of what general society believes about them tends to make this difficult. In the case of Alice Davis, her current self-concept has been reinforced by society's view of ageing, but has been created in the first place by her own feeling of usefulness or lack thereof.

Tha narrative makes it clear that Alice's life before her husband's death has not been an unhappy one. After early retirement, she had a group of friends who she met regularly, and with whom she was able to maintain her sense of contribution to society by continuing volunteer work. This contribution that she made to society seems to be an important component of Alice's sense of fulfilment and general happiness.

When she moved to Florida with her husband after his retirement, the couple still maintained an active social life with friends they made there. Although Alice was no longer doing volunteer work, it seems that the social contact she maintained with others helped her retain her sense of joy and happiness.

The pivotal event that changed this was when Alice's husband had a stroke that disabled him to such a degree that he required nearly constant care. Alice was his primary care giver and this took nearly all her time. This was pivotal, since it cut her off from her friends and, effectively, her contact with society in general. Although this has been somewhat minimal since their move to the retirement village, the fact that Alice was obliged to care for her husband effectively removed most of what she had left of her contact with the world. One might also assume that the emotional and physical toll of providing near constant care for her husband until his death must have been significant and, by association, aging. On the other hand, Alice only reports her feelings of depression and uselessness after her husband's death, which appears to indicate that, even thought it must have been taxing work, her husband's need for care did give her some sense of usefulness and fulfilment.

What is interesting is that Alice reports a dichotomy between her feeling that she is "young" inside, but perceives her mirror image as old and ugly. Her feeling of depression and loneliness also seems to contradict her remaining self-perception as an emotionally youthful person. It appears that Alice's self-perception is the result of two major factors: the fact that she no longer feels useful to those around her and media perceptions of beauty.

It might be argued that the most significant contributing factor in Alice's self-perception is the fact that she no longer feels useful to those around her. Her husband's death removed her duty of care for him. The isolation his condition created during the years before his death also removed her from her social surroundings, which she probably found difficult to reestablish when he died. The feelings of uselessness and isolation this created probably translated themselves in Alice's perception of her physical self as well. This has been reinforced by media images of youth and beauty.

Alice no longer perceives herself as beautiful or indeed youthful, despite her earlier assertion that she feels "young inside." Alice's neighbor describes her as "pretty." For Alice, however, the word "pretty" has become associated with the images of youth and beauty presented on television.

It is an unfortunate fact that Alice's self-perception and its reinforcement by social and media images of age and aging is hardly unique. Older people, and especially those in retirement and care communities, tend to be perceived as old, frail, and unable to continue any sort of contribution to society. This tends to hasten the aging process and, in cases like Alice's, perpetuates a vicious cycle in which aging becomes a curse rather than the blessing that she was first to those around her and then to her husband.

According to Holstein, Parks, and Waymack (2011, p. 11), one important component of care giving and retirement communities is respecting the autonomy of older individuals by providing them with meaningful choice. This means that older people in such communities should be provided with choices that match their remaining cognitive and physical abilities.

When applied to Alice's case, her residence in the retirement community probably means that she is perceived as a person who no longer can or wishes to make meaningful contributions to society in terms of volunteer work. This has been gradually reinforced, first by her move away from the banana group and their active social roles to the mild friendships within the retirement community, and finally to the extreme isolation created by her care for her husband after his stroke. This isolation created for Alice a sense of loneliness that she did not perceive until after his death. All the meaning she derived from life during the last years with her husband derived from his care. Hence, her isolation from her social connections and roles were reinforced by her withdrawal from these connections.

To help Alice reestablish her sense of self-worth, more will be needed than simply calling her "pretty" or trying to convince her that she is still physically attractive. Alice's perception of her mirror image as an "old lady" should be recognized as far more than a physical condition. It is an emotional and spiritual condition created by the gradual isolation described above. The professionals who work with Alice should work to reinject her life with meaning by providing her with meaningful choice. Alice derives meaning from being involved with helping others. If she can be provided with such opportunities again, it is more than likely that her perception of her physical self will improve as well.