Beliefs and conflict behaviors

Conflict Behaviors

People loved to be agreed with. The more time people spend in social relationships, the more likely they are to disagree. In social organizations, management decisions usually take precedent whether or not there is a general consensus. Conflict and frustration are inevitable because of the tensions resulting from disagreements. While individuals should never change or compromise their fundamental values and beliefs, they can use conflict resolution techniques so that there is mutual satisfaction with the outcome of most disputes.

One of the most powerful factors that influences the views that individuals and why they resist the views of others is their ego. Therefore, the most essential conflict resolution skills one can have is the ability to actually listen to what the other person is saying in order to acknowledge the importance of the other persons' views. Listening involves asking questions instead of giving orders; people react very poorly when they are told what to do. Listening is also crucial to developing a clear understanding of what the issue actually is.

Once the problem is understood, it may then become possible to reach a compromise or develop concessions to settle an argument. A cooling off period may help to ease emotions so that a compromise can be intelligently discussed. Differences must be acknowledged, but this requires sensitivity. People do not like to be told they are wrong. To sidestep this problem, it's better to use indirect, non-confrontational communications. Examples include concentrating on addressing what is desired rather than what isn't working, indirectly pointing out another person's mistakes and admitting personal mistakes. The focus should be on "I want" versus "you did" to avoid placing blame on the other party. A compromise implies that each party will get only some of what he/she desires and is formed by identifying common ground; concessions must be given by both sides.

On the organizational side, consensus decision making that involves everyone working together to develop an agreement that all of the people can accept is preferred to totalitarian rule. Unfortunately, the later may be a reality that employees must cope with. In this instance, tolerance will probably be necessary to accept the orders of another even though they are contrary to what one actually believes. The use of persuasion may be useful to convince an authoritative figure to change his/her mind. Knowledge and mutual respect are two of the most valuable factors in persuading a leader. Playing office politics is the most dangerous form of persuasion because managers who ignore the views of others are typically insecure and lack self-confidence. Therefore, they will be threatened by an employee who they feel is going behind their backs or are trying to undermine their authority. Diplomacy, acting in a way that does not cause offence, is the best policy.