Dating and Mating Process and How the Lord Directs US to Mate

Christian Dating

The great mysteries of life are no doubt related to the mating and courting practices of our time. In an era of unlimited access to all temptation this adventure of finding a lifelong mate becomes very challenging. The purpose of this essay is to examine the differences between secular mating and Christian mating in today's modern world. I will point out the general attributes in both and contrast the styles to reveal the necessary steps of holy living within this complex subject.

Buss (2002) summed up the modern scientific approach of dating in his article discussing the varying human mating strategies. He claimed " humans have evolved a complex menu of mating strategies. These include long-term committed mating, brief sexual encounters, and extramarital affairs. Long-term mate preferences are complex, reflecting desires for many different qualities such as kindness, intelligence, mutual attraction, love, dependability, and good health, " (p.57). Of these approaches, long-term committed mating appears to be the only acceptable Christian position. God has chosen His followers based upon their dedication to follow the rule of law, and brief sexual encounters along with adultery does not fit those wishing to attain chastity and their place in heaven.

God has chosen a plan for each one of us and to stray from this plan is impossible. Accepting oneself as a servant of God should help direct themselves to their proper mate. Temptation is everywhere, Proverbs 19:2 gives us some light: "Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way." This teaching helps us understand to seek knowledge before succumbing to desire. In the dating scene, this may be transcribed to mean that potential marriage partners should learn as much as possible about one another before delving into sexual relationships, this, in the Christian world means marriage.

As a result of this divide between the secular world and the Christian world, we see a disparaging of the institution of marriage. Most non- Christians are willing to succumb to temptations of the flesh because of societal pressure. Judging others in this aspect should be avoided as Jesus taught forgiveness as a means to redemption, however one is in full control of their own faculties and knowing what is right or wrong in one's own life should be taken with the most consideration. The Bible teaches us that our rewards are in heaven and in order to reach that point we must come to some understanding and practice of discipline and honest and sincere prayer.