The Definition of a True Friend

Composition II

Illustration Essay

A True Friend

It has been said that human beings are social animals. What this means is that we detest isolation and like to associate with others. It is for this reason that we live in groups or formations such as communities and families. It is also for this reason that we seek to establish close bonds, such as friendship, with others. However, the all-important question in as far as the formation of friendship bonds remains; what does it mean to be a true friend? Are there some inherent qualities a good friend should possess? I am of the opinion that for someone to be deemed a good friend, he must be honest, well-mannered, and dependable

To begin with, a good friend should be honest. In essence, honesty on this front has got to do with the ability to be sincere and truthful. It also involves the unwillingness to engage in deceit. It therefore follows that in all engagements, a good friend should seek to be forthright and frank. For instance, a good friend should not be willing to deceive you for personal gain. Further, a good friend should be ready to criticize your bad choices and/or decisions. This is what being forthright and frank – and, thus, honest - entails. One of the greatest friendship stories I really admire is the Warren Buffett-Charlie Munger comradeship. Buffett has in the past pointed out that in all the years they have been friends with Munger, they have never engaged in an argument. They have, however, occasionally disagreed on certain aspects of business. Electing to disagree with the perspective of a friend, without necessarily being argumentative about it, is what honest friendship is all about.

A good friend also ought to be well-mannered. According to Benjamin, there is a certain psychological concept known as the chameleon effect (274). This involves our tendency to mimic the behavior of persons we closely associate with. It therefore follows that the behaviors and mannerisms of those close to us are likely to rub on us. I would not want to associate with a person whose bad behaviors I could pick. For instance, I am likely to incorporate the offensive words routinely used by a foul-mouthed friend in my discourse with others. In having friends with good behaviors and habits, I would be further strengthening my character and personality.