Learning from overcoming diversity challenges

Admissions have had a recurring dream in which I sit in a classroom, my desk facing everyone else's. All the other students and the instructor are staring at me, their heads twice the size of mine. Sometimes several of the kids start pointing at me, and the entire room then erupts in laughter. They mock me and tease me and all I can do is sit there; I'm paralyzed and can't move.

A wake up from these dreams feeling frightened and ashamed. There is something wrong with me, I think. These dreams reflect my anxiety about fitting in and being accepted. They also illustrate my main weakness of character: low self-esteem. Although I put on a good front and have a great circle of supportive friends and family, I often feel like an outcast, or worse, like my life has no meaning. Disguising my inner turmoil with smiles, good humor, and a positive disposition does nothing to erase the dreams from my subconscious. Deep down I know I have to confront my inner fears and conquer my unwarranted sense of inferiority.

A questioned where I received these negative messages about myself. My parents were not abusive. They didn't tell me I was a worthless child. I've always gotten by in school without too much of a struggle so my teachers couldn't have been responsible for planting these thoughts in my head. My friends have been wonderful: many of them I've known since I was in kindergarten. I had to look somewhere else for the root cause of my recurring dreams.