Divorce as an Experience Is Never Easy

¶ … Divorce as an experience is never easy for anyone, not the adults and especially not the children, on which the effects of divorce can take a serious toll. However, there are some factors that play a significant role in determining the impact of that experience for the child. Age, the way the entire procedure of divorce is handled, how mature parents have behaved throughout it, how the environment of the home remained pre and post divorce all are instrumental in effecting the psychological well-being of the child, whose mind is still young enough to develop imprints that can last a lifetime (University of New Hampshire Cooperative Extension, n.d).

The effects of the breaking up of a family can be very consequential for the growing up child, and can even result in effects like having sex before the age of 16, getting pregnant at a young age like 20, including the use of drugs and alcohol and seriously affecting the psychological and social disadvantages that can go on for a lifetime (Pow, 2011).

In his article, "The Effects of Family Conflict Resolution on Children's Behavior" by Bruce F. Dykeman, he discusses the effects of a conflicted environment on the child and how it can take a toll even on his educational life. He too mentions the many factors that can play a role in contributing more or less towards the effects that might develop after the divorce. These factors include age, the amount of conflict as well as how the parents deal with each other post-divorce -- a factor much emphasized by him.

He also points towards the difficulty in differing between conflicts emerging from the actual divorce or the "effects of a conflictual family relationship," which may exist long before the act of divorce takes place. It is this turmoil experience that leads towards a "difficult time" in school and in studies, as compared to a more established family unit, whether it is a typical two parent home and/or single but stable family. Even if the procedure of divorce takes place smoothly and a smooth foundation is continued to be provided to the child, even post-divorce, then there is little chance that a negative effect would be visible on educational activities of the child.

However, the range of these effects doesn't need to be similar throughout all the children going through the experience of divorce. Sometimes the effects of it can only last for a short period of time, while in some cases it can linger on. This basically depends on the attitudes that the parents themselves adopt in dealing with their spouses in front of their children, as well as what sort of a relationship they form with their children post-divorce.

The school can play one of the most fundamental in role in recognizing the change that a child might be going through because of the circumstances at home, and therefore intervention through the school can be one of the most first steps that can be taken, especially in providing Primary and Secondary Counseling, while more difficult cases of negative behavior can be reported to community agencies, as a territory level of intervention.

The basic focus however of this study is based on the territory intervention program, which took into consideration 21 students, out of which only 15 completed the program, from 5 junior high schools and who had been displaying effects of recently dissolved family. The point of the study remained to understand how the level of conflict could be reduced in the family to effect directly on the class performance of the child. Therefore it became necessary as a first step to take into consideration how the family is working right now as a unit and how they interact and communicate with each other. This was done through the completion of a required "Conflict Tactics Scale" at the start and then at the end of the 6-month program, and in which even the teachers also responded from time to show the changes that they were seeing occur in the child throughout the period of intervention..

The result at the end of the 6-month showed significant improvement to the behavior of the child, with a reduction in verbal aggression and acting out in class behavior. This significantly concretes the idea that intervention through such a life altering experience for the child, like divorce needs to be dealt with caution.

The researcher however seems to ignore all other situations that can also be categorized in the "acting out in the classroom" sort of behavior. These reasons can include anything from abuse to neglect. These issues can also play a vital role in making the child display disruptive behavior (Alastair McPhee, 2009). Sometimes these acting out behavior can be related to something else entirely, like the loss of a close one (Ceridian Corporation, n.d), a situation which can also require therapy and intervention for the young child who has yet to learn how to deal with its emotions.