Family Values Dear Editor: Family

Family Values

Dear Editor:

Family values often change with time, and as society changes. As family values change, so to do parental ideas and attitudes about how children should be raised. My parents were raised in an era where respect and compliance were values not only expected but also commanded. As such, they became parents whose strict environment and household rules facilitated complete compliance and impeccable manners. Children at the time were expected to obey their parents, not question their authority.

Because of my parent's values, I still expect my children in this day and age to demonstrate appropriate manners. As times have changed however so too have I. I realized that following orders isn't as important as allowing children the opportunity to question rules and authority and express their opinions. Curiosity is an important element of growth. Rather than silence my children when they have questions, I encourage their curiosity and in fact often engage them. As such I have very open and nurturing relationships with my children, whom I consider friends as well as family members. This is something I did not experience with my parents during their time, in part because I felt more ordered than empowered.

It is my hope that more parents realize the importance of infusing their children with self-respect and dignity. As parents our goals should not only be to teach our children important concepts like manners, but also to empower them to engage their intellect and spirit. Children by nature are curious, and it is this curiosity that may potentially help them forge new and beneficial insights and contributions to their own families and communities in the years to come. I believe that my parents did the best job they could given the information they had at the time and the values reflected during their time. As you can see I have carried many of their beliefs with me. As society has adopted more liberal viewpoints so too have I in raising my own children. It will be interesting to see what my children take from their experiences as they grow older and raise their own children.

Part B

Dear Son,

As you know I value your insight and friendship. Ours is a relationship founded on trust, love and understanding. These are among what I consider important values in any relationship, whether with a parent, friends, sibling or partner. When I was a young man, my parents commanded discipline and order. They also taught me that it is important to respect others manners. Unfortunately I often felt I was not encouraged to ask questions and instead felt it was my duty to obey my parents without question or face disciplinary action as a result of my disrespect. This is one of the reasons I am often so encouraging of your own thoughts, opinions and ideas.