Imagining: concepts, practices, and applications

¶ … Human beings constantly seek a sense of belonging, even identity from the society within which they live. Unfortunately, humans as a breed possess superficial differences while intrinsically being the same. Such superficial differences often leads to segregation and the drawing of lines between different 'types.' Discrimination has always existed historically and continues in one form or the other (race, color, religion, wealth or sexual preferences) even today in spite of the exponential advances in social and behavioral sciences that have established the physiological and psychological sameness of pattern in humans everywhere. Studs Terkel's Roberto Acuna, Migrant Farm Worker and Claudio's Becoming Myself in Souls Looking Back are texts that highlight the emotional trauma, which is caused by different types of discrimination. Taken at face value, both texts appear to be a strong comment and protest against unthinking and cruel discriminating behavior. The more powerful message contained in both texts, however, is that the 'discriminated' are liberated from the narrowness of conventional dogmas once they cease to struggle for acceptance and instead reach a level of self-actualization that allows them to: achieve a profound self-awareness; form a strength of conviction in their own beliefs; and to leave their own distinctive mark on society through a unique personal expression.

Both Roberto Acuna and Claudio are made highly aware of the fact that they are different in some way. Roberto suffers from the jeering laughter of the Anglo kids because he is a Chicano. The Anglos, through their laughter, imply that everything about Roberto and his brothers is inferior whether it is the dried tortillas they eat for lunch, the dust on their clothes or the fact that they can't speak English. The discriminatory behavior of the Anglos not only hurts the pride and dignity of the Acuna family, it creates a sense of fear that makes them afraid just to go to town to buy what they need.

Claudio's situation is somewhat different to that faced by Roberto but with the same net result of a sense of inferiority, insecurity and fear. Claudio's homosexuality though well hidden from the world still makes him aware that his is a difference that would lead to family, friends and society rejecting him if it ever came out in the open. Claudio instinctively senses that people would never accept him even though he constantly hears people advising him to be true to himself.

Initially, the discrimination and rejection faced by Roberto and Claudio lead to both of them reaching out for acceptance by conforming and trying to live up to the norms and expectations of society. Roberto tries to gain social acceptance through living up to the ideals of a patriotic, first-class citizen. In school, he works hard at memorizing the Gettysburg Address in the hope of being selected as Abe Lincoln in the school patriotic play. When he turns sixteen, he takes the job of foreman as he believes the position brings with it better recognition of his status although he ends up making less money than the braceros who do piecework. He even joins the Marine Corps in a bid for acceptance.

Like Roberto, Claudio too strives for social acceptance. The only contrasting factor between Roberto and Claudio is the fact that the former seeks to gain acceptance while the latter strives to ensure that his current status in society is not jeopardized by his homosexuality. Claudio lives life in the proverbial closet, pretending to be attracted by girls and constantly making up stories to keep up with what he perceives as the norm for boys of his age group.

This striving for acceptance conflicts with Roberto's and Claudio's true feelings and sympathies, thereby adding to their already disturbed emotional state. Roberto is torn between being sympathetic to the workers' problems, writing their letters for them, buying their clothes, and being a good company man who pushes the workers ever harder to do a good job. While Claudio's dual existence ultimately becomes such a strain that he turns to alcohol and finally attempts to commit suicide.

The turning point for both Roberto and Claudio finally comes with self-realization. Roberto quits his job at Soledad State Prison not because he fears the ensuing harassment emanating from his refusal to use a rubber hose on prisoners, but because he realizes that he could never become what they wanted him to be - a mean man. This initial self-assertion soon leads to his noticing how everything "...was so wrong. When growers can have an intricate watering system to irrigate their crops but they can't have running water inside the houses of workers...treat him like a farm implement. In fact, they treat their implements...domestic animals better." (Terkel, p. 135, para 6) Roberto's growing sense of his own individual identity and self-worth ultimately leads him to quitting his job as a company man and joining the workers movement for better working conditions. The decision to join the movement also brings with it a sense of belonging and peace at having found his place in life.

Like Roberto, Claudio finds the solution to his problem lies in accepting the fact that as a gay man, he could never hope for acceptance even from his own black brothers and that he would be better off looking for friends elsewhere who would accept him for what he was. More important in Claudio's case was his acceptance of his gayness and decision to be true to himself: "Being able to muster up enough courage to tell Jason that I was gay was one of the most liberating processes I have ever experienced. For me, coming out was a way to show the enormous self-respect I had and a refusal to continue being ashamed of my homosexuality." (Claudio, p. 107, para 1)

Roberto and Claudio's stories share another very revealing insight and that is often, the fear of rejection leads to our underestimating the capacity of loved ones to understand and sympathize. Roberto finds his mother incredibly supportive and proud of his decision, even admitting a realization that seeking a better social position was not the right answer for him. Similarly, Claudio is both relieved and delighted at the degree of acceptance he gets from Jason, his mother, grandmother and brothers. Here, too, it is evident that neither Roberto nor Claudio would have ever known the gratification derived from such acceptance if they hadn't found the courage to actualize their own self-identity.