Japanese Men, Masculinity and Family

Japanese Men, Masculinity and Family

Japanese Men, Masculinity and Fatherhood

The traditional role of men in Japanese society and in the Japanese family is one of the aloof bread-winner. This role comes directly from the Japanese cultural history, rooted in Confucianism. The expectation under these social roles dictates that men work and remain distant from their families while maintaining a masculine authority over the household. Since the 1970s, these traditional roles have been threatened by social changes including modernity, technological advances, and the feminist movement in Japan. Women have sought work outside the home, often postponing marriage or expecting different male-female relationship roles. At the same time, Japanese society continues to expect the same masculine traits from Japanese men. Confusing gender roles, unfocused masculinity, and marital problems are the result. Through this, men in Japanese society continue to fulfill their role as aloof, masculine family power, but with results that are not as successful as they once were.

As an island nation, Japan developed while separated from other cultures. Ideals and social functions became ingrained over hundreds of years of habit and practice (Sugihara & Katsurada 2002). Some roles are familiar to other nations and culture. Like most nations, the role of mother dictated that women were responsible for much of the child and home care. However, Confucianism also had a great role to play in Japanese family structure as far as hierarchy and power. Confucianism has had a great effect on the development of male stereotypes, roles, and expectations in Japan. It dictates a hierarchy, "which assumes subordinates' obedience to superiors and men's dominance over women and children" (Sugihara & Katsurada, 2002 p. 443). Naturally, social expectations set in motion long ago are now deeply ingrained in Japanese society and the expectations of Japanese people. Confucianism has set the traditional stage for family life in Japan.

In the traditional Japanese family, men are "expected to be leaders, risk-takers, and decision makers" (Sugihara & Katsurada 2000, p. 311). They provide for the family by going to work and often work long hours. As a result, they have limited contact with their wives and children. This allows for the traditional Japanese husband and father to hold a significant amount of control over his family, mainly through expectation and respect (Seto, Bekerm & Akutsu 2006). Children do not develop intimate relationships with their father and so do not act normally when he is home, instead acting necessarily respectful. Fathers begin to invoke a sense of awe and respect in their children, as well as their wives (Roberson 2003).

The Japanese household and family unit has changed in the past few decades. Much of the change in the Japanese household in the past thirty years in not due as much to change in Japan's men, but rather is the result of women changing. The feminist movement of the 1970s affected Japan's women in a significant way. Women no longer portray the traditional "ideal" of a quiet, subservient wife and mother, decorated and pigeon-toed to demonstrate chastity (Suzuki 2007). In fact, it is no longer uncommon for women in Japan to have premarital sex, smoke, and choose not to marry. Many of these choices would not have been considered an option for women in Japanese society in the past (Suzuki 2007). The number of women in the workforce in Japan has risen steadily for decades, and many women have expressed a desire to delay marriage in pursuit or a career or financial independence (Sugihara & Katsurada 2002). The Japanese family has changed as a result.

Men are still expected to have the masculine traits that have long been related with Japanese fathers and husbands. The power that Japanese men have is ingrained in the culture, whether individuals are aware of it or not. A 2002 study of Japanese men and women found that both sexes rated certain qualities as more desirable in men and some as more desirable in women. The items considered desirable in men included having leadership abilities, having guts, being persuasive, and being relied on by others. Conversely, female desirable traits included affectionate, charming, polite, and attentive to the needs of others (Sugihara & Katsurada 2002).

While men are still trying to fit into their role as aloof, respected father figure, they are no longer able to demand the authority and respect that the head of household once assumed. Instead, they are conflicted by their feelings of responsibility and the mixed reactions that they receive from women in the Japanese society. Suzuki (2007) reports that many Japanese men consider Japanese women "too demanding" (p. 432). A greater number of Japanese men have sought marriage partners outside of Japan due to the disconcerting roles that are expected of them. Since Japanese women no longer feel comfortable with the assumed traditional Japanese family roles, men who desire to live by the traditional masculine traits have increasingly taken Filapina brides (Suzuki 2007). Such women are able to mesh better in a family environment with traditional Japanese husbands and fathers, who do not know how to reconcile their masculinity and the independent Japanese woman (Suzuki 2007).

Men are also finding a new role in fatherhood, often hampered by their instinct to be a "hands-off" father. In one case described by Seto, Becker & Akutso (2006), a businessman sought counseling because of his inability to process a situation in which his wife had left his family due to their son's delinquent behavior. Not only was the man unable to relate to his teenage son, but he was also completely unaware of his wife's unhappiness. As a result, he was surprised and confused by her leaving and did not know how to proceed as a single father. This lack of awareness, born out of a male familial aloofness, is very common among husbands and fathers in Japan (Seto, Becker & Akutso 2006).

Fathering is perhaps the most difficult change for men who are expected to maintain their masculine traits while adapting to a new family model. Fathering is difficult for Japanese men because they have internal conflicts between maintaining a socially acceptable masculine facade and attending to family needs (Seto, Becker & Akutso, 2006). While their new social position has necessitated that they have more hands-on contact with home and family life, their traits stay the same because they are so ingrained in the social fabric.

Though studies report that men are now less masculine than stereotypes expect them to be, "Japanese society still strongly believes and practices a gendered division of labor in which a man's place is at work and woman's place is at home" (Sugihara & Katsurada 2000, p. 311). Further, both men and women in modern Japan were found to favor male stereotypes, especially in comparison with female stereotypes, when tested (Sugihara & Katsurada 2002). The conflict from these social beliefs makes it difficult for men to find their place in the family unit because they are torn between adjusting to the modern social changes or bowing to long-standing social expectations.