Amy Tan\'s the Kitchen God\'s

¶ … Amy Tan's the Kitchen God's Wife and what the author of this paper learned from reading the book. Some of the elements discussed include cultural lessons, relationship lessons and lessons about learning to live between two cultural beliefs and be content.

The Kitchen God's Wife

In Amy Tan's the Kitchen God's Wife, I was instantly transported into another world. There have been many books written about the different cultures in the world but few of them touch on the bittersweet confusion that can occur when one culture collides with another culture.

I think that part of the appeal of this particular story is the fact that not only do two cultures collide, but two generations also collide which brings to light the very real minefield that a child and a parent must navigate on the way to adulthood and once the child is an adult they must then navigate their way through oceans of cultural and personal differences.

When all is said and done, this book teaches the valuable lesson that while cultural differences are real and the generation gap is here to stay, the truth remains that there is a bond between mothers and daughters that nothing can truly destroy.

The story is between Pearl and her mother, who is named Winnie. Winnie is from the old country in China and a lot of the book takes the reader back in time to Winnie's childhood and the culture that she lived in during that time. At the time the book opens Pearl is grown up and married with two children of her own and they have decided to visit Winnie for a family wedding (Tan, 2006).

Winnie is not pleased that Pearl's husband is not Asian and really makes no secret about that fact though she is subtle because of the way she was raised and the culture she holds onto.

At the wedding, Pearl and her mom have a big fight and when they talk to make up Pearl finally learns about the life and times of her mother in the old country and begins to understand why her mother reacts and feels the way she does about so many issues.

Pearl has a happy and content marriage with a man, who loves her and their children, so when she learns of Winnie's fate, originally married to a man who she at first thought was romantic but turned out to be a bore and somewhat of an ogre she begins to understand Winnie's seeming distrust of Pearl's husband.

As the story unfolds, Pearl gains insight into the suffering of her mother. She was beaten, mistreated in other ways and generally abused by the husband who was supposed to love her and take care of her.

Pearl begins to understand her mother's heart and mindset. She finds out how it came to be that her mother moved to America and the secret is released that Winnie has been holding her entire life.

Pearl's father, or at least the man she always knew as her father is not her biological father and she realizes through this story that her mother made choices in life that caused her great pain but later found someone who would love Pearl as his own and raise her as such (Tan, 2006).

After hearing her mother's life story Pearl gains a tremendous respect for what her mother has gone through and a renewed sense of appreciation for her own husband and children.

It is interesting to note that through it all her mother holds onto her Chinese heritage and customs. One might think that after all the abuse and sadness that Winnie suffered at the hands of her first husband she would want to move as far away as possible from that culture, but instead she seems stuck in it, unable to break free. At the same time however, throughout the story one cannot help but wonder if part of her anger at Pearl is less about the fact that her daughter does not hold to the old customs but about the fact that Pearl is able to adapt to America's customs and not worry about the customs of the old country. There may be an underlying resentment there that is not fully explored in the book.

While their lives and ideas seem to be completely different, Pearl is able to relate to her mother's hardships because in America it is a known fact that many women are abused by their husbands and there are shelters across the country for them to turn to. While Pearl has a loving family and good husband she finds herself relating to her mother as a young girl and young adult in needing to escape because on a much smaller less dramatic scale Pearl had the need to escape her mother's constant nagging, diligence and insistence that Pearl follow the old customs even in America.