This report is designed to give the counselor some idea of how to counsel a person in crisis and their family. the crisis here is that Marie has had a stroke and this has rendered her incapable of taking care of herself. The family is three daughters , the oldest two do not want to take care of her and want her in a nursing home, the youngest is willing to provide the care.
Person-in-Crisis Scenario
Marie's Developmental Stage
Marie is a 63-year-old female who has exhibited the properties of one stage for the last several years of her life, but she is now entering another developmental stage due to her illness. A person in middle to adulthood stage, according to Erikson is working out the dichotomy of generativity vs. stagnation (Watts, Cockcroft & Duncan, 2009). About this stage, Erikson says
"the fashionable insistence on dramatizing the dependence of children on adults often blinds us to the dependence of the older generation on the younger ones. Mature man needs to be needed, and maturity needs guidance as well as encouragement from what has been produced and must be taken care of" (Watts, Cockroft, & Duncan, 2009, 305).
This points out the difficulty that Marie is currently facing. She has been the matriarch of the family and has fostered the successful development of three daughters and seen another generation begin to develop. However, she is now moving into the last developmental stage in the life cycle, late adulthood, because of the crisis in her life. She now faces the question of whether she will enjoy ego integrity or immerse herself into despair and the fear of death and life left unlived.
Marie's Role Within the Family
Marie has been the matriarch of the family. She has been tasked with maintaining a firm but loving hand with her daughters and the rest of her immediate relatives. This role has been usurped by the fact that she can no longer fulfill this role. Marie's role was primarily a factor of her own beliefs about her generativity, but she may now be focusing on despair as she realizes the daunting tasks ahead of her because of her illness. The stroke has also caused her to realize that she will soon face death, and she is probably not ready for it yet.
Family Developmental Life Cycle
Since the three daughters have a mother in her sixties they are likely either in their forties or approaching that age. This puts them in the launching children and moving on stage of family development according to McGoldrick and Carter (Goldenberg & Goldenberg, 2008, 41). At this stage in family life the "family must com e to accept their children's independent role and eventual creation of their own families" (Goldenberg & Goldenberg, 2008, 41). The older daughters are definitely in this stage and may not want to get back into the caretaking role with their mother because of their need to forge lives independent of a constant care role.
The Family Change
Marie had a stroke which has caused he to need constant care. She was a teacher for many years and did not require the assistance of anybody else. This means that she will need to have some form of relatively constant care. This is difficult for her because she has been independent and matriarchal for most of her adult life, and it is also difficult for her daughters who are not ready to have a mother who needs such constant care.
The Conflict
The mother, as mentioned above, is going to need to constant care of a family member, nurse or require a care facility that is able to meet her needs. Marie does not want to live in a nursing home where she may have to be for a long time, and the older daughters do not want to have the responsibility of their mother's care. The older daughters see no reason why she cannot live in a nursing facility. The youngest daughter is willing to provide the care that her mother will need because she just wants her mom to be happy at the end of her life.
Counseling Steps
With all such situations it would be important to have the four people involved in the dispute come to the office together. The daughters have relied on the strength their mother has displayed, and the older two may resent the fact that this aspect of their mother has been taken away from them. The older daughters may also be happy that their mother is no longer able to rule their lives, so they want to push her aside as quickly as possible. The mother is having more difficulty to what will be a complete change in her life. The younger daughter seems to be in a good place, but may have more difficulty letting go of her mother.
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