Life Was My Decision to Resist Against

¶ … life was my decision to resist against the problem of laryngeal dyskenesia. This is an illness, which makes a person believe that he or she is not receiving enough oxygen, which in turn causes the person to hyperventilate. he/she started feeling as if his/her throat is closing. The situation becomes so painful that the victim cannot even speak. It is no doubt a nightmare to go through and those who have experienced it can only feel the pain that it gives. This problem usually occurs on the occasions when the victim is feeling nervous, upset, or frightened. I got infected with this disease in my freshman year of high school.

The experience of being a freshman in school was very disappointing for me. Although, I succeeded in getting admission to the school of my choice and was awarded full scholarship but my relationships with my peers proved to be a disaster. In the beginning I was quite positive about the school and made some very good friends there. However, within the time span of two to three months majority of the girls had turned against me. Even those who were supposed to be my friend in the beginning turned their back on me. I was left out alone and was not invited in many of the extra curricular activities. Even this situation was somewhat acceptable to me but things started to become worst when girls in school started to tease and scorn on me. When things became extremely worst I started to feel extremely disappointed and frustrated. I wanted to complain against the odd behavior of my mates but there was no one in school to listen to my complain. Even the teachers never tried to forbid the girls from teasing me and always used to remain quite when anyone ever tormented me. My inability to express my anger and frustration led to the development of this breathing syndrome. The problem became increasingly sever in the coming few years and started having frequent attacks.

This problem started to create hindrance in my singing activities. Singing is my obsession and I constantly sing. As I began to take singing classes at school and joined the school choir, I became increasingly concerned about my breathing problem. Whenever I tried to sing in front of a large audience or even a small group of people, I started feeling nervous and as a result of this nervousness I have experienced attacks. I have tried out for The New Jersey All- State Chorus twice and in the middle of both of my auditions I had one of these occurrences. This situation was extremely disturbing for me and I started having a feeling that I was going to die. My disappointment was at a level where I was unable to figure out as to what was going on with me.