Single parent families: characteristics and societal impacts

¶ … parent families caused by adoption by a single parent and divorce.

A two parent family will always be considered the perfect family as it allows for a male and female role model. However, life is not always perfect and a changing society is creating new family dynamics within the community. From a two parent family structure the scene is changing to a single parent family created through divorce, lack of marriage and in some circumstances choice. Yet, psychologists remain firm on the fact that it is the two parent family that is the most successful. Still, since the family structure is changing and we have to deal with single parent families we must aim to understand the different dynamics of the single parent families.

Analysis: Common Factors in Single Parenting Most of the research done on single parent families is focused on the mother as the primary caretaker. However, trends are changing and the father as the caretaker is also being taken into account. There are some common factors in single parenting and these include the parent being more focused on the child in terms of individuality, the parent giving more leniencies to the child and the parent being less disciplinary when compared to a two parent family [Hamner, Tommie, and Turner, 1985].

Becoming a single parent is in most circumstances tough. One person has to be responsible for the education, morality, health and individual growth of the child/children which is never an easy job. Our violent society further causes problems as the parent has to protect the child inside and outside the house. Yet, with the increasing statistics related to single parenthood society and its rules are being adapted so that single parenthood is no longer the trial that it used to be. The most common factors for successful single parenting include:

Open communication with the children and any other care takers

Organized Management of the household

Accepting Self-Esteem for both children and self

Maintain discipline and rituals

Single Parent Family created through: Divorce / Adoption

While social and economic factors to a large extent determine the characteristics and approach of the single parent towards taking care of the child the basic characteristics remain the same. Other factors that contribute to the family dynamics are the cause of single parenthood which may arise for example due to divorce and/or adoption by choice.

Characteristics of a Single Parent Family created through Divorce

When two people have children they create a nuclear family. They become interdependent on each other for support and try to create a lifestyle that involves each member of the family. When this dependency is broken through divorce the dynamics change causing chaos. The change from a two parent family to that of a single parent family is traumatic and can create a lot of challenges. Children may be caught in a tough divorce and custodial suit. The cause of divorce may have caused bitterness in the parents that would reflect in their attitudes towards each other causing the children to feel divided in their loyalties. [Demo and Cox, 2000]

There is then a perpetual division in lifestyle of the custodial parent and the visiting parent that may cause strife between the parent and child. The children may have disciplinary problems when they refuse to meet the demands of the custodial parent. The single parent may create challenges by not accepting their ex-partner as an active part of the child's life. The boundaries shift and the children and parents find it hard for a time to create a balance. Professional help maybe needed to help cope with the changing dynamics and create new ones.

Characteristics of a Single Parent Family created through Adoption

A single parent family created through adoption may find the change and challenges easier to handle depending on the age of the child being adopted- -- the younger the child the easier the adoption. The adoptive family makes a deliberate choice in their circumstances. The single parent whether male or female would have weighed the pros and cons and then decided to adopt. This would suggest a choice that many divorced parent's lack. This then creates more stability and allows for the circumstances to be more stable. The child does not have to be in a constant struggle of loyalty and finds it easier to adapt. There are less negative feelings to cope with and the choices and values are easier to instill for the single parent. [Lansford et al., 2001] Adoptive single parents have a key advantage that they give the child the belief that the child is wanted. The parent chose the child and thus, the relationship between parent and child is bound to be more positive as the frustrations are taken as challenges and the parent is apt to look at negative scenarios more positively.