There are things parents can do to help children who have a parent suffering from Parkinson's disease. They can make sure the children understand the disease and how it affects the parent. They can build a support network of friends and relatives to help out when necessary and to nurture the children when they need it. One man, married to a wife with Parkinson's writes, "Strong wrote her book at a time when the plight of 'well spouses' was ignored by doctors, the government, and even friends, who tended to be concerned only with the ill spouse. 'The rest of the world shies away or just plain flees,' she wrote. 'Few people know who we are and what we need'" (Kondracke, 2001, p. 166). Instead of "fleeing," well relatives need to offer help, support, and concern to the family, and worry about the children, too.
Many children may suffer because of lack of attention, too. The family may be so caught up in taking care of the patient that there is little time left for the rest of the family. It may seem to them that they no longer matter, and that the suffering parent has become the focus of the household. They may even react negatively to this lack of attention. Experts recommend explaining the disease and the changes it will necessitate to the children, and involving them in a team effort to help the patient.
Finally, it is clear that Parkinson's disease can have a huge affect on the entire family. A mother may be unable to care for her children or continue working. A father may be unable to work and provide for the family. Adult children may be faced with issues of mortality they would rather not face, such as urging parents to set up Living Wills and "Do Not Resuscitate" orders with their physicians. Children of any age can be deeply affected by the death of a parent, and sadly, many parents suffering with Parkinson's leave behind family. Dealing with the loss...
Understanding, patience, and truthfulness are all important factors in preparing children for the loss of a parent. The loss will always be hard, but with the support of family and friends, it can be made a bit more bearable and understandable.
In conclusion, children with parents who suffer from Parkinson's disease will suffer effects from the experience. As one child asked her mother, "Why do you have to have Parkinson's?' I tried to explain, but she kept saying, 'I want you to be like you were before. It just isn't fair because Kyle and Erik got to see you like you were before and I never have'" (Lane, 2005). Children may have a different view of the world, of God, and of their own mortality as they learn to cope with a parent suffering from the disease. They may also literally develop differently through their brain and thought formation. Clearly, any parent who suffers from a debilitating disease has a profound affect on the family, and especially the children. That is why social workers, counselors, and psychologists should understand the affects of debilitating diseases, and how to help the children whose parents suffer from these diseases.
References
2006.) Contemporary theories and children's lives.
Kondracke, M. (2001). Saving Milly: Love, politics, and Parkinson's disease. New York: Public Affairs.
Lane, M. (2005). Helping your child cope with your PD. Retrieved from the PDF.org Website: www.pdf.org/Publications/newsletters/spring05/Helping_Your_Children.cfm4 Oct. 2006.
Perkin, G.D. (2003). An illustrated pocketbook of Parkinson's disease and related disorders. Boca Raton, FL: Parthenon.
Ramsey, P.G. (2004). Teaching & learning in a diverse world. New York: Teachers College Press. Pp 16-42.
