Reflection on personal growth and self-assessment

¶ … Values

Generally, I believe that it is important to be truthful to others and more importantly to oneself, to have a love of truth. This is typically described as an intellectual curiosity but I believe that curiosity is much deeper and is important to ending one's own suffering, which I believe is the natural condition of all beings.

I believe that it is important to be just and fair in my treatment of others and in my general opinions and decisions. Most people in the world know what is right in most situations but they do not have the combination of restraint and active will or courage to do the right thing. This is perhaps the most unnecessary and inexplicable cause of harm to human society.

I believe that it is important to be reasonable in the sense of reconsidering one's original position. It is not only important for getting along in society, but it also allows one to get past false understandings which may come from impulsive and misguided self-interest. Being reasonable allows one important avenue to improve oneself, through the ideas of others, unavailable through one's own thoughts, which can be limiting.

I believe that it is important to be compassionate in the sense of understanding the experiences of others. This expresses itself through sensitivity and tolerance of others, even when their actions are disagreeable.

I believe that it is important to be contemplative, being observant of one's internal environment, thoughts as well as emotions. The mind plays a huge part in creating one's reality and if it is important to understand its processes.

Lastly, I believe that it is important to be strong in the sense of being resilient and firm in one's values. Part of the reason for this value is because it is useful for survival but also in order to strengthen and preserve the prior five values.

Oftentimes, my desire to be compassionate and reasonable with others conflicts with my respect for the truth and justice. I am very open in the range of people I associate with and befriend and sometimes they do things which I do not believe are right or wise, for example, disparaging or harshly criticizing someone without basis or mistreating someone because of past offenses without letting them know why. This offends my sense of truth, fairness, and justice. Yet, I am sometimes conflicted on whether I should take a judge, punish, or even take a stand on it because I know that everyone has a reason for doing something, no matter how misguided, yet I feel hypocritical, negligent, and cowardly for not acting on my beliefs and doing what I believe is right. This sometimes seems like a lack of personal strength and firmness or an aversion to uncomfortable obligations.

Sometimes, I am able to uphold my sense of truth and fairness by expressing alternative considerations to my friends. This is only possible when I believe that I understand what is truly motivating my friends' disagreeable behavior. This requires me to be compassionate as well as reasonable. It also requires that I speak very carefully and diplomatically and have the courage to risk the ill-will and resentment from my friends. Thus, the value of personal strength and firmness guides me through such conflicts.