Business Writing Dear Maria I Am Writing

Business Writing

Dear Maria

I am writing to tell you about a course I am taking in Advanced Business Writing. This assignment asked me to write you a letter. Because English is not your first language, I will write this letter using simple phrases and words. However, I want to encourage you to practice your English. If there are any words you do not understand, please do not hesitate to ask me to define them for you. Alternatively, you can use a dictionary.

Without much guidance as to what to write about in this letter, I will continue by discussing the best way to make a sandwich. Sandwiches are integral to advanced business writing. A good sandwich can make you a better writer, because writing on an empty stomach sometimes leads to disastrous results. Sandwiches are best eaten during the day, although you are free to consume sandwiches for breakfast or dinner if you please. The most important thing to understand is that when you eat a sandwich at your desk while writing a letter, you must keep your area clean. Crumbs can get all over your keyboard, and can also make your desk look unprofessional. This course in advanced business writing is for professionals, which is why it is important to keep a clean desk. A clean desk also does not attract bugs. Crumbs, when left unattended to, may attract ants and other insects.

Sandwiches can contain a number of different and delicious ingredients. I could tell you that the varieties of sandwich are potentially infinite, but I would prefer to avoid hyperbole in an advanced business writing course. If you are a vegan, your sandwich options are more limited than if you are a meat eater or a vegetarian. However, many vegan sandwiches are delicious. The classic childhood comfort food for many American children is the peanut butter and jam sandwich. A peanut butter and jam sandwich is deceptively simple. The worst ones are made with pre-sliced industrial white bread, perhaps with the brand name of Wonder. Jiffy peanut butter is also a terrible abomination, and ideally should be avoided if you take your sandwiches and your health seriously. The best peanut butter sandwiches begin with wholesome ingredients, such as real peanut butter made from nothing but ground peanuts and salt. I prefer to experiment with different types of fruit preserves to go with the peanut butter. Exotic fruit preserves such as fig are fun to try, but you might prefer a standard complement to peanut butter such as grape or strawberry jam. Instead of using bread that has a long list of chemicals in the ingredients, try buying bread from an actual bakery. Bakeries are small businesses, and they may need your services as a business writer if and when you pass this course.

Another great American sandwich is grilled cheese. A grilled cheese sandwich can be a powerful lunch or snack to eat while you are working on your Advanced Business Writing course material. You can make a grilled cheese sandwich yourself at home. Try using sourdough bread for your grilled cheese, and whatever you do, do not use "American cheese." Anything labeled "processed cheese food" or "American cheese" should be banned because it resembles plastic more than it resembles cheese. Do yourself and your body a favor and buy a cheese like gruyere, which is easy to find, inexpensive, and ideal for melting. Your advanced business writing skills will undoubtedly improve when you are well nourished. Thank you for listening to my comments, and I wish you luck.

Memorandum

To: The WRTG 394 Team

Re: The wart on Mr. Tirchner's face

Background: Mr. Tirchener is a valued member of our writing department. He has ten years of experience, and is well suited for our team. However, Mr. Tirchener has a wart on his face. The wart is prominent, and many people have trouble speaking with Mr. Tirchener because the wart is distracting. I have noticed that there is a lack of eye contact being used when people interact with Mr. Tirchener. Most importantly, Mr. Tirchener overheard several students making fun of his wart. As a result, Mr. Tirchener has expressed discontent with his work and has recently filed a complaint with human resources.

Suggestions: The following suggestions have been brought to my attention about what to do about Mr. Tirchener and his wart.

Start a fund raising campaign to help Mr. Tirchener pay for the dermatology or plastic surgery intervention required to remove the wart. It is believed that Mr. Tirchener would be happier and handsomer if he did not have a wart on his face. Some students have suggested that Mr. Tirchener is actually a good looking man, but the wart completely ruins his face. The removal of the wart would boost his confidence and make him a more productive member of the team. It is likely that if Mr. Tirchener did remove the wart, he would engage more socially with his colleagues and the workplace environment might improve. Furthermore, Mr. Tirchener might feel ingratiated to the office for the efforts made to pay for his wart removal. Workplace morale would be boosted.

Fire Mr. Tirchener. This is a stupid suggestion made by one of the members of our team. I am including it here to communicate how disappointed I am that members of our team have sunk to this low level. We do not intend to fire Mr. Tirchener, who is a valuable worker. Besides, it is highly likely that Mr. Tirchener would file a lawsuit if he subsequently got a hold of this memorandum indicating that the cause for his dismissal was the wart on his face.