Personal Development the Important Part of Creating

¶ … Personal Development

The important part of creating a healthy lifestyle for yourself is to create a plan that makes sense both for your body and your mental makeup, and stick with it to see if it really works. Being in a long-term relationship requires attention to intimate details. The motivation to engage in sexual intimacy can fade with time, even if you love the person. This is "the most common presenting problem at sex therapy clinics" (Impett, et al., 2008). The Impett group conducted three studies to find out if "strong approach goals" -- like fun, growth and development -- predict greater sexual desire (p. 808). The results: "approach relationship goals" helped to "elevate desire"; and individuals with "strong approach goals" enjoyed greater desire when positive relationship events were carried out. I found this to be true, after setting aside Friday nights for dinner, a movie, and romance at home, four weeks in a row.

The late Dr. Sandra Leiblum suggests that every 4 to 8 weeks couples should plan a "sensual pleasuring session or a playful erotic session," and in these sessions intercourse is not an option. In other words, couples need to experiment, explore, and use sensual stimuli to arouse each other in new and exciting ways (Leiblum, 2010, p. 88).

Part of healthy, motivated intimacy starts with a healthy body. Just a half hour or twenty minutes on a treadmill produces results (I know, I do at least 20 minutes 5 times a week); it strengths the heart muscles; improves circulation; improves energy levels; lowers blood pressure; reduces body fat, reduces stress, anxiety, improves sleep and makes a person feel healthy (WebMD.com). In addition, a person should limit alcohol (2 drinks a day for men, 1 for women), should avoid smoking, practice "safe sex," avoid sun exposure and get cancer screenings (FamilyDoctor.org).

As for a sense of belonging, Hazel Blears, Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government in the UK, suggests that social networking sites aren't necessarily the best way to be truly connected with other people. She suggests getting involved with neighbors rather than logging on to Facebook. "A sense of belonging to the immediate neighbourhood is a key indicator of community cohesion," Blears explains.

I find very interesting and helpful literature on psychological health by typing in the phrase "personal development for health" in Google Books. Books very often provide information you won't find just searching Google per se. For example, in Essential Concepts for Healthy Living (Alters, et al., 2009) the authors explain that the "…quality of one's psychological health often affects the other components of health…social, spiritual, and physical health." A key to becoming a psychologically healthy person is being able to "express…emotions appropriately" and that includes expressing anger appropriately, along with happiness, sadness and fear (Alters). Another Google Books discovery reflects the fact that individuals may have a mental disorder and not realize it; depression, or an eating disorder, or anxiety disorder, is considered a mental disorder (Buchanan, 2010). Moreover, if a person is depressed and does nothing about it -- I have not had this problem but friends have had depression -- it can become "psychotic," during which time a person suffers "a loss of touch with reality" (Buchanan).