Adults and Children: Shaping Gender Roles Early in Life

¶ … adults treat young people, including how they talk to them, is part of the gendering process wherein a sexual identity is formed. Indeed, Romaine (1999) notes that, "Boys and girls live in different worlds in which separate cultures are developed and transmitted, each with quite different patterns of verbal interaction" (p. 190). This paper examines some of the implications of differences in the ways adults speak to boys and girls to determine how such speech differences contribute to later differences not only in speech, but also in attitudes. It is reasonable to suggest that when young people are addressed with respect and consideration, they will respond in kind. When young people are addressed with ridicule and contempt, though, their reactions will inevitably be different.

Likewise, when adults address boys as "young men" or girls as "young women," they are communicating a sense of gender appropriateness that will influence these young people's perceptions of themselves over time. If adults call a boy "little girl," "sissy," "pansy," or any of the other myriad insults that convey a sense of femaleness, though, this will likely have an adverse effect on their sense of self as a male (Gaine & George, 1999). In this regard, Gaine and George emphasize that, "By far the majority of verbal insults for men resonate with notions of femininity (sissy, wimp)" (1999, p. 86).

Researchers have examined the climate of sexual relations that pervades secondary schools in the United States and found that girls' confidence is undermined and they are made to feel a profound sense of inferiority (Gaine & George, 1999). According to Romaine (1999) the manner in which young people are addressed at home is frequently mirrored in the schools. For instance, Romaine reports that, "Schools too show patterns of gender separation, some of which continue patterns already learned at home, whereas others are introduced in the school setting" (p. 190). Indeed, Gaine and George emphasize that, "Sexual harassment, which is demonstrated through unwelcome verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature, is experienced by girls on a regular basis" (p. 86).

There is also a tendency for adults to chastise demonstrations of any gender inappropriate behaviors on the part of girls and boys, but especially boys. For instance, Gaine and George point out that, "Compulsory heterosexuality is implicit in the gender roles which students are expected and encouraged to adopt and within the sexist norms which prevail in our society" (1999, p. 86). In this "it takes a village" environment, adults routinely communicate appropriate and inappropriate gender roles to young people, especially boys, without any particular regard for the adverse effect these communications might have on young people. As Gaine and George (1999) emphasize, "The homophobic discourse is used by teachers to challenge a boy's masculinity when he fails to reflect the dominant masculinist behaviour in, say, sports or in other arenas of the school life by calling him a pansy or sissy" (p. 87).