¶ … Hook or Me This Time Ideological changes of a Pirate and a former Lost Boy in two narrative essays)

Life is defined by the changes that take place during it. Our bodies change and we grow larger; time passes and we grow older; our philosophy and ideals change and we grow up. These metamorphoses compromise any coming of age story, whether the story be one of a small juvenile accomplishment or one of a complete maturation of character. Both "Labyrinthine" and "Happiness" are essays which tell coming of age stories. Both narrators recall past childhood events and recount them like scenes from a play where we have a behind-the-schenes, first-person perspective on the action. There are many similarities between the two stories told. Both essays feature adults whose childhood years are long ago and far away. Both narrators remember feeling isolated and removed from other characters around them. Both narrators use religious metaphors in their writing, and both experience a significant change in their ideological thoughts about the world between childhood and adulthood. One difference between the two essays is that the narrator of "Labyrinthine" has a very scientific and analytical mind, even as a child, while the narrator of "Happiness" was carefree and creative as a child at play. However, the most significant difference between the two essays is that "Labyrinthine" ends with the narrator being content and grateful for his shift into an adult way of thought, while "Happiness" ends with a longing for and return to the narrator's childhood home.

The story of "Labyrinthine" begins with a child determinedly solving the puzzle of a mouse-seeking-cheese maze with crayons. The narrator attempts to set the scene like the opening of an action/adventure movie, where the protagonist is confronted with an obstacle larger than life, and the amazing show of skill and ingenuity that it takes to solve this life-riddle and become victorious...

The child develops what may be a creepy genius obsession with mazes, and is haunted by his never-ending desire to solve the maze of life. Mazes appear to him in the rug, in his mother's blouse, in fact they are everywhere! But no maze can satisfy him, so instead he begins to create his own like a mad scientist on a quest for the Holy Grail, "like the faithful who see Christ on the side of a barn or peering up from a corn tortilla...," forever attempting to draw in victims willing to challenge the superiority of his created puzzle masterpiece. The dull parents refuse to participate, and the child is confused as to why anyone would choose the boring over an exciting challenge. Could this child be preparing for some unknown cataclysmic event where his dedication to mazes will save humanity? Will his dedication to his work bring about a tragedy so great that he is forced to martyr himself to the great piece of cheese at the center of the maze of the universe? No -- the adventure is that he is going to grow old and become as boring and lazy as his parents, no longer having any drive to create or solve mazes which just get in the way of being a grumpy old man.
Unfortunately, while this could be a wonderful satirical tale which uses the anticlimax to reveal a deep inner truth about society, the author's writing attempts fall flat on their face, and instead of being a seat-gripping ride of emotion, it instead reads like a cheap mass-produced piece of Christian propaganda aimed at the lowest common denominator of the religion. In fact, the reader can visualize the clipart cross in pastels and stock photo of wise-eyed parents and the ready-for-church-smile of the young boy, printed at low resolution on cheap paper. This serious lack of writing skill, however, is right on track with the moral of this narrator's tale. This narrator…