Reflective Listening1
Feeling: Regret/remorse
Empathic response: “Sometimes it’s not so important that we go back and try to change things, but rather that we look forward with that same desire. Use that regret to make the rest of your life better. It’s actually a good thing to feel that way. It shows that you are aware and have developed a deeper understanding of things. A lot of people don’t attain that level of awareness.”
2
Feeling: Frightened/anxious/traumatized
Empathic response: “The important thing to remember is that you’re here now and safe. You have a lot of good things in your life and your experience, for whatever reason, may have been allowed to happen to help you see things afresh. Do you ever feel like things in your life, people, places appear to you in a new light since your accident? If you do, that may be an indication that you were taking them for granted before. Maybe there is a reason all of this happened.”
3
Feeling: Angry
Empathic response: “Yes, but perhaps there is something here that we are missing. He may have had a reason—at least in his own mind—for what he did. Did you ever think that perhaps he was trying to help? Maybe he thought he would be doing...
Emotional Intelligence What am I going to do when I learn that a classmate has basically stolen my story idea and is winning a contest using my story? What should I do if I discover that a classmate had used the plot and theme of a story I wrote a few months ago, and simply changed the names of my original characters and changed the place in which my story was
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