Faith, Family, and Identity: A Personal Religious Journey

Introduction: Roots of Faith and Family

In some ways, my life history is very typical of someone born in the early 1990s. In other ways, it is quite extraordinary. I was born in South Africa during a particularly tumultuous period in that nation's history. My father is a physician and director of a medical company, overseeing the sale of medical devices and reagents in South Africa. My mother recently moved to North Carolina, where she currently practices as a registered nurse. It could be said, then, that the practice of medicine and a commitment to caring for and serving others through the medical profession is in my DNA.

Given that my parents are busy medical professionals with rather "Type A" personalities, this had an indelible impact upon my upbringing, despite the fact that to the outside world we might have looked like a fairly typical middle-class family. I am the fourth and youngest child of our busy, bustling household. My father and mother ran our home not unlike a hospital unit — with strict, yet fair and exacting standards. Indeed, as a former seminarian, my father was very unsympathetic to the common teenage notion that sleeping late on weekends is acceptable, or that it is occasionally permissible to slack on homework. Our 6:00 a.m. wake-up calls were non-negotiable, even during vacations.

A Disciplined Upbringing and Its Lasting Impact

Every day we were required to do something productive and useful, even when school was not in session. When I was younger, I wished I could waste time like my friends. Looking back, however, I am grateful for the discipline that was instilled in me. It has been very helpful on multiple occasions throughout my life. I also appreciate the fact that my father held very high expectations of himself and imposed those same standards upon his family, because he believed he had benefited from them as a young man. Similarly, my mother demonstrated that it was possible to raise a large family while working as a nurse, precisely because of her dedication.

Faith as the Center of Family Life

Faith was a very important part of our family life and was integrated into our daily routine in a positive way. Every morning we began by saying the Holy Rosary and the Litany of the Blessed Virgin Mary. My father and mother regularly attended morning Mass when my mother was not on duty as a midwife at the nearby Apostle's Hospital. Their personal example illustrated, just as powerfully as any words, the idea that dedication to one's profession and a life of faith could exist simultaneously and were not mutually exclusive.

When my sisters and brother did not have school — such as during holidays or on weekends — we would join our parents at Mass. While some of my non-believing friends naturally assumed that my siblings and I regarded this as a chore, I actually enjoyed the experience a great deal. Even when I did not fully understand what was happening as a child, I loved the sense of community and togetherness that existed at church — the sense of belonging to a family where everyone could come before God together, no matter what stresses and strains we had endured. This, along with my devotions at home, was a source of great satisfaction.