This paper analyzes the central claims made by David Wertheimer in his article "99.9% of Grammar Is Obsolete," published in Digital Web Magazine. Wertheimer argues that conventional grammatical rules are becoming irrelevant in the age of internet and mobile communication, replaced by abbreviations and shorthand he terms "internet-speak." The paper examines his key supporting claims: that abbreviations now define written communication, that time constraints drive the shift away from standard English, and that many users lack the grammatical knowledge needed to write conventionally. The analysis also notes Wertheimer's sarcastic tone and his implicit challenge to grammarians to adapt to modern communicative norms.
David Wertheimer's article "99.9% of Grammar Is Obsolete" advances the thesis that conventional grammatical rules and conventions have become obsolete in the wake of internet-facilitated communication and the widespread adoption of mobile devices. Writing in a sarcastic style, Wertheimer simultaneously embraces the new developments reshaping the English language and warns that standard written English is in serious decline. He emphasizes several distinct claims to demonstrate the veracity of his thesis, each of which addresses a different dimension of how and why language is changing in the digital age.
Wertheimer argues that the specific form the new language is taking — or perhaps has already taken — is built on abbreviations. He alternately labels this emerging mode of communication "newspeak" or "internet-speak," as illustrated in the following passage:
"As users evolve, becoming accustomed to one another's abbreviations and time constraints, grammar continues to deteriorate. Depending on needs, the folks on the Internet have taken matters into their own hands, feeding customized 'Internet-speak' — a practice elsewhere known as 'shorthand'" (Wertheimer, 2002).
The growing prevalence of abbreviations in written communication is central to Wertheimer's argument. Significantly, it implies that the underlying spoken language remains largely intact — individuals using internet-speak still employ the same words that English has always contained; they are simply writing them in new, condensed ways. Scholars studying computer-mediated communication have long observed this tension between linguistic efficiency and grammatical convention.
A second substantial claim Wertheimer makes is that the transformation of written English is driven largely by temporal pressures. Writing with abbreviations allows people to communicate far more quickly than spelling out complete words. He makes this point explicit in the following quotation: "Abbreviations make it possible to type short messages for all devices as easily and quickly as just for one. Between the spiraling time commitments of full sentences...online shorthand provides the only approach to online communication that makes...sense" (Wertheimer, 2002).
It is worth noting Wertheimer's word choices here. He describes the time required to write complete, conventional sentences as "spiraling" — a term that implies something out of control — while characterizing shorthand-based communication as producing "short" messages, implying efficiency and practicality. The principle of linguistic economy, which holds that speakers and writers naturally gravitate toward less effortful forms of expression, underlies much of this argument.
"Grammatical ignorance normalizes rule-breaking online"
The author claims that time constraints and difficulty understanding standard written English contribute to the widespread usage of abbreviations. He also claims that the internet is fueling this trend. Together, these arguments form a pointed — if satirical — case that conventional grammar has been displaced by the practical demands of digital communication.
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