This essay examines the parallel yet distinct experiences of motherhood in Shilpi S. Gowda's novel Secret Daughter through the characters Kavita and Somer. While both women face the loss of children—Kavita forced to give up her newborn daughter due to gender preference, and Somer losing her unborn child to miscarriage—they each find different paths to motherhood. Kavita eventually gives birth to a son, Vijay, in India, while Somer adopts a daughter, Asha, in the United States. The essay explores how cultural context, geography, and family circumstances shape their maternal experiences and their children's upbringings, illustrating that motherhood itself is not a universal experience but deeply influenced by individual circumstances and cultural values.
As John Keats once stated, "Nothing ever becomes real till it is experienced." In Shilpi S. Gowda's book Secret Daughter, there are powerful experiences with pregnancy, childbirth, and nursing. The first display of these experiences is shown through Kavita and Somer: Kavita gives birth to a girl under distressing circumstances, while Somer goes through a miscarriage. Both women experience the profound loss of their babies, though through different means. Jasu, Kavita's husband, desires a boy who can help in the fields and will not burden their family. So Kavita and Jasu put their newborn daughter up for adoption. Somer, on the other hand, loses her baby while pregnant. Despite these different circumstances, both Kavita and Somer share the devastating experience of having their babies taken away from them.
It is not easy for a mother to have her baby taken away, and this is what is similar in Kavita and Somer's motherhood experiences. Gowda infuses the idea of adoption when Jasu forces Kavita to give up her newborn daughter simply because males are the preferred gender. Kavita lies in labor on the sweaty mud floor of the hut, praying that she gives birth to a boy. When she delivers a girl and slowly unwraps the cloth to reveal the newborn, Jasu will not accept her because he prefers a boy. Jasu arrives excited to see his prince but sees a baby girl instead. He rejects her and tells Kavita to get rid of her. Kavita says, "This is our baby. We created her together. I carried her inside me. Let me have one night before you take her" (Gowda 16). Despite her resistance, Kavita must listen to Jasu and give her baby away, highlighting the powerlessness she feels in her own motherhood.
Somer's loss comes through a different but equally traumatic path. Somer is pregnant and works at the same hospital as her husband, Krishnan. As she grabs her medical journal and clutches her abdomen, she runs toward the washroom and sees bright red blood dripping down. Fearing something is wrong, she calls Krishnan. After he arrives, the doctor checks her and tells her she is clear. However, Somer is quiet for the next few days and does not want to discuss her baby or her shattered dreams. She says, "Maybe I'm just not meant to be a mother" (12). Unlike Kavita, whose loss is forced upon her by family pressure, Somer's baby is taken away through miscarriage, a loss beyond anyone's control. Both women, however, experience the same emotional devastation of losing their children.
A woman can become a mother in any way, whether through giving birth or by adopting a child. Kavita's path to motherhood continues after her initial loss. In her fifth month of her next pregnancy, Jasu and Kavita go to an ultrasound procedure. Kavita is restless, holding her stomach and wanting to know the gender of her baby. Jasu's toes are fidgeting because he wants a boy who will not be a burden on them. When the technician moves the device on her belly and looks at the images on the screen, he says, "Congratulations, it is a healthy boy!" (49). Jasu is beyond excited while Kavita is in relief. She can finally become a mother who can keep the baby and nurse him, and she finally feels a connection with the unborn baby in her stomach. However, Kavita still feels the sorrow of giving up her two daughters in her earlier births, a pain that will likely never fully disappear.
Somer's path to motherhood is fundamentally different. After her miscarriage, Somer is saddened and must deal with the emotional aftermath. As she sits in the tub on what would have been her due date, she reflects on the life that could have been. After getting ready, she catches a flight to visit her mother, where she shares her sad situation about how she cannot become a mother in her life. Her family and Krishnan understand and try to explore other ways to have a baby. Somer and Krishnan decide to pursue adoption, as it is their only option left. Both of them fly to Bombay and visit an adoption agency where they meet Asha. After all the orphanage, courthouse, and government paperwork is completed, they return home with Asha and are greeted by Sarla, Krishnan's mother. Sarla says, "What a beautiful baby she is. Hello, Asha beti" (79). Somer and Krishnan bring Asha home and work to make her feel comfortable and safe. Since Asha is adopted, they all make an effort to get to know her.
Kavita finally becomes a mother by giving birth to a baby boy, Vijay, while Somer finally becomes a mother by adopting Asha. These two different paths illustrate that motherhood is not defined by biology alone but by commitment and love. Each woman, having experienced loss and longing, finds her own way to nurture and raise a child.
"Vijay in India and Asha in the United States develop under different cultural influences"
"Conclusion on motherhood as shaped by individual and cultural circumstances"
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