Greetings, Thanks! I'm NAME, I used to be in banking, until the S&L crisis.
in fact my first job was as a teller; I moved up the normal channels, our branch became so successful I was promoted into regional management. We did so well our bank was taken over, and I was downsized, along with all the rest of middle management, and so I started this consulting firm.
So now I just use banks. Why? Well I have to, to some degree, but because I want to make money, and that's what banks do.
Why do you go to work every day? Well, to make money! Why does the bank open its doors every day? To make money. Anyone here want to make more money? Who wants to make more? I'm here to tell you today how you can do that, and also have a better time at work.
Who am I? I'm a consultant for high-powered training firm.
So why would management hire us to come speak to you here today?
Well, if their job is to improve the bank's performance,
They wouldn't do this if it was a waste of money. They think this is an investment.
So if they think the bank will make more money by you having a better day at work, and you will also make more, then it's in your interest to have a better day at work, every day.
Does that sound like a win?
As a high powered training consultant
I deal every day w / firms using boilerplate team building exercises. You know the type: Someone jumps off a chair; we catch them with our pinkie fingers, we all put our hands together in a circle and high-five like back in soccer camp.
These trainings are useful in some situations but in most corporate cultures these days, workers have already seen all that.
The fact is team identification comes down to shared risk and trust in many ways (Al-Swidi and Mahmood, 2011, p. 30), so firms do the falling exercise; speed dating and all that but after they've tried those one-size-fits-all team building exercises, they call us [pointing at self]. Why? Those exercises are fun but only partially effective. Again, why? After too many of these trainings people see through the hype. It's called diminishing marginal returns. The point is people are too smart for that anymore. Anyone seen "Office Space"? Yeah right. [laughs.]
Problem is the trainers don't give the deeper content, explain why this useful to participants. It ends up as cheerleading without addressing deeper structural problems. [This all complimenting their intelligence, experience.]
I'm speaking candidly to you like this because I'm trying to convince you of your own self-interest in buying into what I tell you here today. Why? So you can have better day at work, every day. Why is that? It will make more money for the bank. Why do that? To make more money for yourself. And, ultimately job security. [Pause: pacing.]
Now that I've shown you my cards, I'm going to let you off the hook. Ultimately it's all your boss's fault. [Laughter.] You know your boss, right, he's sitting right over there: Let's hear it for the boss: Hey? [clapping.] Yeah you better applaud [laughing]. But again, why did your boss pay good money to bring me here today? [He] wants you to have a better time at work.
See [he's] not such a bad [guy], why does [he] want this? [Change gender depending on situation.]
Because he wants the firm to grow. And so do you, I argue.
So now in every speech comes the "this is what I'm going to tell you" part.
I'm going to tell you about the latest research on interpersonal communication, that comes from linguistics; semiotics; programming, psychothereapy and of course organizational development. This is what I do in my office much of the time, stay up-to-date on scientific, peer-reviewed studies just like back in college.
Well what the corporate sector at large including banking already knows is that recruitment and training is one of the largest internal costs faced by any firm, particularly as they get larger. Make sense? Hiring new workers is a huge cost to corporate America every day. Well why do people change jobs? Very often they find a better…