Of the Farm by Updike: A Portrait of Relationships

Introduction

In John Updike's short novel Of the Farm, the protagonist Joey Robinson is a divorced, thirty-five-year-old Manhattan advertising executive. The story takes place during Joey's visit to his mother Mary's unfarmed farm with his new wife Peggy and his stepson Richard. The novel examines the complexities of familial relations and the ramifications of divorce, as well as the difficulties of dealing with an aging parent. Updike takes on the realities of the life of an uprooted man with a broken marriage and a new wife — one who is dealing with the sadness of being separated from his children, struggling in his relationship with his stepson, and navigating the complex love-hate dynamic he shares with his aging mother.

Joey harbors pent-up resentment against his mother for various reasons: for making his father move to the farm from a life in the suburbs, for refusing to leave the farm herself, and — in his view — for the failure of his first marriage.

Peggy and Her Mother-in-Law

During the short visit it appears Joey wants his mother to approve of Peggy. His mother had never approved of his first wife, Joan. However, as the story progresses it becomes obvious this approval is not going to come. Updike hints at the trouble ahead in an exchange between Joey and his mother as they discuss his new family:

"The boy," my mother said, "seems bright." "Yes, I think he is." "It's interesting," she continued, "because the mother doesn't seem so." This blow was delivered in the darkness like a pillow of warmth against my face. I felt myself at the point at which, years ago, in this same room, I had failed Joan. Yet I respected — was captive within — my mother's sense of truth. My response was weak: "Not?" "I'm surprised at you," my mother went on, in a voice whose timbre was deadened by her horizontal position. "At what?" "That you need a stupid woman to give you confidence." (pp. 31–32)

Eventually Joey's mother confronts Peggy directly, questioning her mothering skills and trying to drive a wedge between Peggy and her son. When Peggy asks her mother-in-law, "Do you think Richard should be a farmer?" she responds, "I think it would take more imagination than you'll permit him to have" (p. 82).

Things begin to escalate when Joey's mother says, "I'm sorry Peggy, you're trying hard but so are we all. You should not be jealous of me and this boy [Richard]" (p. 82). Updike then reveals the source of the animosity: "She takes my grandchildren from me, she turns my son into a namby-pamby, and now she won't let me show this poor worried child a little affection, which he badly needs" (p. 82).

Joey and His Mother

The relationship between Joey and his mother is complex. Joey perceives that his marriage with Joan was sabotaged by his mother, yet it is clear that he cares about her deeply and that she cares about him, as evidenced by this exchange:

"Truly? You seem a little short of breath, but otherwise —" "I have what they used to call 'spells.' The last one, I was out on the far field with the dogs and I think they must have dragged me back — all I remember is crawling upstairs on all fours and taking the pills I could find — one of each. When I woke up it was the same time of day the next day and Flossie had half chewed through the window sash above the bookcase. They still get up there and look for George to come home." "You should have called me." "You were on your honeymoon. Anyway, Joey, your father and I had our differences but there was one thing we agreed on and that was we wanted to die cheap. It's hard now, you know. The doctors have these machines that keep you going long enough to empty everybody's bank account." "You can't reduce everything to money." "What would you reduce it to? Sex?" I blushed, and in the space of a breath she took pity, continuing, "Now tell me honestly. Am I a burden?" "No. The money I send you is the least of my problems." (p. 26)

During one confrontation with Peggy, his mother asserts, "As to Joey and me…I'm the first woman he's ever met who was willing to let him be a man." This causes Joey to reflect that, "This was her secret song, the justification with which she led me to divorce" (p. 83).

Joey's mother later asks him directly, "Do you think you've made a mistake?" Joey responds, "A mistake how?" "By divorcing Joan and marrying Peggy" (p. 101).

Further along in the novel Joey asks his mother, "Why did you dislike Joan so much? In the end you made me dislike her." His mother replies, "You imagine that. I liked Joan….It's amazing how much I love her now that she's in Canada" (pp. 102–103). She then says of Peggy, "That woman. She's fierce. She'll have me dead within a year" (p. 103).

Conclusion

This novel revolves around the tense conversations between Joey, Peggy, and Mary and their attempt to remain civil and avoid complete disaster. The novel's conclusion sees Joey and his mother implicitly coming to terms with the antagonistic relationship that exists between them. There is no explicit reconciliation or dramatic resolution. This may leave some readers unsatisfied; however, it is representative of how most families actually function. Updike's Of the Farm ultimately suggests that fractured families rarely achieve neat closure — they simply endure, carrying their resentments and affections forward together.