Cindy Chupack Daters Remorse

Cindy Chupack talks about dating, love and not dating in a hilarious way. She is honest, witty and totally charming in her book (Chupack, 2013). She discusses ‘relationship reruns’ – a point where you sober up and realize that the men you meet are no different from the ones you previously dated. She also talks about ‘relocationships’ – when you have to move place and live in an area you would have never imagined. Just like a post-date phone call late in the night, Dispatches from the Dating Front Lines is quite reassuring. It states, “…you may be single, but not the only one.”
Think of an individual who goes shopping, spends a lot of money and feels excited about the purchases made (Chupack, 2013). Later, the shopper feels guilty and regrets spending so much money on unnecessary things. That is how it goes with a dater’s remorse. Although some dates end up well in healthy, lasting relationships filled with love, most awkwardly lose enthusiasm either by one person or both parties. That is what is known as dater’s remorse. On a day out, one can give out contact information such as phone number for a call post the date or even another date, only to get disappointment. Dates can be exciting and all, but end with completely opposite emotions.
The first set of flirty messages often see couples or potential couples end up on a date. Phone calls dictate what to wear, where to go for the date and whether he should pay. The exciting messages lead to dates (Chupack, 2013). The excitement can continue for days before the likelihood and enthusiasm of a loving, lasting relationship cease. That simply means the daters do not have a connection, and might not want to see the other party again. That is dater’s remorse.
Unlike returning a pair of shoes to the shop for replacement, returning a date is not easy. When enthusiasm dies, daters must keep in mind apparent feelings that come with dating. The cycle often repeats itself: meeting a guy, getting excited, emotions leading to a date, giving out contact information and developing pessimism about possible future dates. At that point, it becomes difficult to decide on a dater’s next move (Chupack, 2013). That is true despite the number of times daters have undergone the cycle that keeps repeating itself. How does the party with little to no enthusiasm break up a relationship that only lasted one or two dates? Break-ups are hard to deal with, but being dumped is even more difficult. More so if it involves two people who never really got to date officially. Could that be an ego buster?













References
Chupack, C. (2013). Dispatches from the dating front lines.