Recommendations for Counseling a Single Parent

Single parents are a heterogeneous cohort and there is no one “right” method or “best” counseling method. On the other hand, a lot of different therapeutic interventions may be appropriate depending on the parent’s needs, the presenting problems, the gender and ethnic background of the parent, the parent’s spiritual or religious worldview, and the parent’s sexual orientation. The age of the child will also have a bearing on which therapeutic interventions would work best in any given client’s case. Personal preferences may also make one counseling style or therapeutic practice work better than others, and some trial-and-error may be warranted. In spite of their tremendous intra-group differences, single parents may face some of the same challenges including financial strain, stress management, and child behavior problems. Therefore, group therapy is likely to be an effective solution for many single parents. Group therapy can also be combined with individual counseling and family therapy.
Research substantiates the use of multiple modes of therapy concurrently, particularly combining group therapy with filial therapies (Vafa & Khaidzir, 2009). Filial therapy includes play and other relationship-building activities that address the needs of both parent and child. The therapeutic interventions have been shown to “enhance and strengthen parent-child relationships through teaching parents necessary skills to become therapeutic agents in dealing with their own children’s social, emotional, and behavioral problems,” (Vafa & Khaidzir, 2019, p. 4). By focusing on the parent’s behaviors, the filial therapy methods also prevent children from being misdiagnosed with mental health problems and encourage single parents to develop resilience and healthy coping styles.
However, group therapies might also be necessary to help single parents cope. Lipman & Boyle (2005) found that community-based group therapies were especially helpful with mood elevation and self-esteem improvement but ironically, not on social support building. Reasons for the results may be related to extraneous variables, but generally group therapies do offer single parents the opportunity to learn how other people cope with stress, build networks that can help alleviate childcare burdens, and build community-based solutions for single parents. Financial strain remains a major burden for many single parents, which is why community-based programs can help to inspire affordable childcare options and alleviate feelings of isolation (Lipman & Boyle, 2005). One thing that group therapy does not effectively address is how to adapt parenting styles, which is why combining group therapy with filial therapy may be effective. Filial therapy does directly address parenting styles, helping single parents to think differently about their child’s problems, be more responsive to their child’s needs, be more aware of and able to manage their own emotions, and improve overall confidence and competency (Vafa & Khaidzir, 2009). Newly single parents may especially benefit from a combination of group and filial therapy to prevent problems from occurring.
Depending on the situation, it may also be possible to involve the non-custodial parent in the therapeutic interventions. Neither group therapy nor individual therapy can fulfill all of the single parent’s needs. However, counseling can improve the parent’s outlook, reduce signs of depression and anxiety, and prevent the child from developing mood and behavioral problems too. A combination of therapeutic interventions that address parenting styles and coping mechanisms is the best option for single parents. Single parenting entails dramatic shifts in the role one plays as a parent, and how the child views and responds to the parent. The parent’s identity changes, and the relationship with the child changes too. Time and resource management become crucial, but so too does emotional self-regulation and responsiveness to the child.





References

Lipman, E.L. & Boyle, M.H. (2005). Social support and education groups for single mothers: a randomized controlled trial of a community-based program. CMAJ 173(12): 1451-1456.
Vafa, M.A. & Khaidzir, H.I. (2009). Reaching out to single parent children through filial therapy. US-China Education Review 6(2): 1-12.