The Diving Bell and The Butterfly Reflection

Jean Dominique Bauby, aged 42, had his life flash before his eyes. Everything he knew was no longer helpful as he was stuck in his own body. On one sunny day while driving to a movie with his son, he started swerving and mumbling until he had to pull over, completely immobile. The next think he knew he was waking up in a hospital bed, “locked in” his own body, completely paralyzed except for his left eye, which was his only way to communicate to the outside world. The doctor came in and explained he just experienced a brain stem stroke, which resulted in Locked-in Syndrome.

Prior to the catastrophic event, Mr. Bauby was the Editor in Chief of Elle Magazine and was in the process to getting a book deal. Mrs. Bauby’s speech language pathologist set up a communication code so that he can communicate with the outside world. She would read the alphabet out loud according to the frequency of its use and have him blink his working eye when to stop at a letter. She would continue this process until she expressed what he wanted to say. After accepting his fate, he had his speech therapist reach out to the literary agent in order to continue with the deal in progress. He used the strength he had to write his memoir.
Having the ability to write a book while completely paralyzed, except for blinking one eye, is beyond inspirational. It is the definition of ‘you can do anything you put your mind to.’ I found the book to be very inspiring and eye opening. I learned a lot about the condition of brainstem stroke and Locked-in Syndrome as well as reevaluating my outlook on life. I believe people take most things for granted, especially the little things we do in daily life such as walking and talking. Unfortunately, no one takes the time to stop and appreciate what they have. People are always rushing, not enjoying the actual moment. You never think about how your life can completely change in one instant. Unfortunately, it only takes a life threatening moment to truly appreciate what we have.
It also got me thinking about how hard it must have been for his children to process this whole situation, especially his son. At such a young age, his son saw his father’s life crumbling right in front of his eyes. When Mr. Bauby talks about the times his children visit him, it is heart breaking. He refers to himself as a zombie, and discusses how his son, Theophile, wipes off the saliva dropping from his closed lips. He states, “his movements are tentative, at once tender and fearful, as if he were dealing with an animal of unpredictable reactions.” To know your son is somewhat scared of you is heart wrenching. From the children’s perspective, you know that this person is your father, but at the same time, do not recognize the man sitting in front of you. Mr. Bauby even states that his daughter, Celeste, cradles her fathers head in her arms, kisses him, and says over and over, “You’re my dad, you’re my dad”. I can’t imagine what that must feel like for both parties.
Another heart wrenching part of the book that stuck with me was when he discussed ‘Sunday’. He described Sunday as a dreadful day. It was a day without speech therapist, physical therapist or psychologist, and possibly no visitors. There is nothing to pass the hours. To be all alone, locked in your body and also your bed with no one to ease the pain and pass the time once a week sounds unbearable. The day must feel like a week. From my personal experience, I get cabin fever just from being home all day. To be alone once a week unable to control your body, take a stroll if needed is agonizing. He explains that, “Olympic wrestling is child’s play compared to this Sunday.” I couldn't agree more. This book has encouraged me to be grateful for everyday, and live in the moment because you never know when it can all be taken away.