Introduction This field report covers two separate visits to a Narcotics Anonymous (NA) meeting, both at the St. Matthews Missionary Baptist Church, located at 6100 NW 24th Avenue in Miami, Florida. Both meetings started at 5:15PM and ended at 6:30PM. One of the meetings took place on Tuesday, November 28, and the other on Friday, December 1, 2017. Both meetings have a theme called “Inner City Recovery.” Located in the heart of Liberty City, St. Matthews caters to the local African-American community. Unsurprisingly, attendants of the both the Inner City Recovery NA meetings were predominantly black males with a low socio-economic status. Results of the fieldwork illustrates the role Twelve Step programs like NA play in recovery.

Meeting Description

The fieldwork took place over the course of two non-contiguous days. On Tuesday, November 28, the meeting had a theme focused on Step Two of the Twelve Steps: “We came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” The Friday meeting did not focus on a specific step and was structured more like an open meeting. However, both meetings are structured with an opening discussion that leads towards individuals sharing stories. Only about fifteen people attended the Tuesday meeting, whereas the Friday meeting included many more—close to fifty.

The meeting room is large, and belonging to the church, has some religious iconography adorning the walls. There are also inspirational sayings, which coincide with the spiritual tenor of the NA meetings. Both of the meetings began with an opening prayer and concluded with a finishing prayer. During the less crowded Tuesday meeting, participants were asked to move their chairs in a circle, whereas for the Friday meeting, seats were arranged in rows. At both meetings, a proctor had set up a table full of Narcotics Anonymous and other Twelve Step literature, including copies of “The Big Book,” and other literature both free and for sale. No dues are collected, but there is a small donation box on the table where participants may drop money that can be used for members who cannot afford to purchase the literature. There were also some used copies of the literature for sale at a discounted price. Several men were browsing the collection of pamphlets when the leader called the meeting to adjourn.

Both meetings were structured. The Tuesday meeting started with two prayers: the Lord’s prayer and the Serenity prayer. Group members held hands during the prayers. The leader then introduced himself by saying, “Hi, my name is John and I’m an addict.” The other members of the group said, “Hi, John.” After affirming everyone’s presence in the room through eye contact, John started by saying that they were going to focus on Step Two of the Twelve Steps. Reading the full text of the step aloud first, the speaker than proceeded to share his take on what “coming to believe” means to him. First, he talked about the fact that he was always a religious person in the sense that he believed in God and had respect for the church. He then posed a rhetorical question, “How do we come to believe again?” The speaker then said that through recovery one has the opportunity to...

He said that “coming to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore is to sanity” is one of the most powerful steps in all the twelve because it is the moment where we take that leap of faith. The speaker said that he strayed from God not by using drugs, but by failing to have faith that God was there for him when he needed God, or when things got so rough he did not know where to turn. He never stopped believing in God, the leader said, but he never fully believed that God cared for him. As a result, he turned to drugs. Drugs became his best friend, his ally, his support system, effectively a proxy for God. He felt invincible at first: the drugs made him feel on top of the world. Feeling powerful and capable of managing his emotions while on drugs, he started to lose touch with reality. Soon his life started falling apart because he put all his trust into drugs, and none of it into God.
Then, the speaker started to focus on the concept of sanity versus insanity. He said that a lot of people who come to these meetings struggle with the term “insanity.” Then he iterated a saying that is common in the Twelve Step setting, which is that “insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” When several of the members of the group chuckled, the speaker smiled and looked them in the eyes. He said that insanity was shouting at his mother at the top of his lungs for no reason. Insanity was hitting his friend for no reason. Insanity was running around at 2 or 3 in the morning desperate to get high. Insanity was getting high at work. Insanity was losing the love of his life to drugs. When he said this latter thing, the speaker’s voice choked up; he was visibly emotional reflecting on the low point of his life. Yet these low points were what led him to “come to believe,” as he put it.

People nodded while he spoke, affirming that they could relate. After the leader completed his sharing, the people in the room clapped out of genuine appreciation. Then the leader said he was going to open the floor for others to share their stories of recovery. The people who nodded enthusiastically and with a big smile seemed like veterans to the group. One immediately put up his hand, and when given a nod of approval, started to speak. “Hi, my name is Elijah and I’m an addict and an alcoholic and a gambling addict!” He said it laughingly and humbly at the same time. The other group members echoed, “Hi, Elijah!” Elijah shared his story, and his was followed by one of the three women at the meeting who shared her story. Although all their stories were different, common themes emerged among them including being at rock bottom before being willing to change. All three tried to return to the theme of the meeting, of coming to believe that God could restore one to sanity, by sharing their struggle with faith. With faith comes freedom, the woman said as she spoke, but we need to believe also that we are worthy of God’s love. “Let me tell you,” she said, “You are worthy. Every single one of you. Don’t you ever forget it. As soon as you believe…