This reader was aware of the importance of family in traditional Chinese culture, but not to the extend shown in Ning's life. For her entire lifetime, in fact, Ning's sole purpose was to remain close to her children and grandchildren -- to pass on the wisdom of the elders and to ensure that the lineage of the family was carried to the next generation. Little did her family know just how much Ning gave up just to ensure that her family would have enough to eat and the children could grow up and have families of their own. This, too, is something that is not really present in modern American culture. While families still get together at holidays, and some are closer than others, the idea of "family first" is not a pervasive idea like it was for Ning. How likely, for instance, would it be that someone would give up a great job or a new life in a new place just to remain home with a child? Instead, the modern woman would find day-care and attempt to balance both.

This theme of balance is another predominant philosophy from Ning. When Ning was younger, she deferred to the wisdom of the elders and the ideas put upon her as a youth -- namely that tradition and destiny are predetermined. It was interesting to chart the manner in which Ning grew emotionally as she aged to realize that she made her own existence, her own present, and her own future. As Ning turned from a victim waiting for a husband to bring home money for food to a working woman serving many families, she found she had to cast out any dependence upon others for her own welfare and actively take charge of her life and make the future for her children the way she envisioned it. However, it was this dichotomy between independence and reliance on traditional values that separated Ning from many of her friends and relatives. At the same time, it strengthened her, giving us all a life lesson to contemplate.

Many times during the reading of the book this reader had to stop and realize that this was not fiction -- that the things that happened here were ostensibly real and told to Ms. Pruitt by Ning herself. Too, one must ask why the memoirs of someone born in 1867 who told her story in the 1940s, would have any impact or relevance to contemporary society. In fact, we find ourselves saddened that the book ends in 1938 with the Japanese invasion of Beijing. This is primarily because we have come to know this character like a member of our own family, and taken wisdom, encouragement and advice from her, much as we might our own grandmother.