Firelight: history, uses, and cultural significance

Firelight

In "The Night in Question" by Tobias Wolff, "firelight" is that unreal state of mind that comes just before you awake in the morning. You are not quite sure you are awake, but you are not quite asleep either. This is a dreamlike state and it seems like almost anything can happen while you are in it. You know that you are in bed, but in your mind you could be anywhere, doing anything, and it somehow seems real. When you are fully awake, you are not sure if what you thought was real or an illusion. That is firelight. There is something hypnotic about the firelight, and there is something comforting about it. You feel as if nothing awful can happen to you while you are in that dreamlike state. In the story, firelight means safety, home, and comfort to the young boy, and that is why he does not want to leave the warmth of the fire. The fire represents what he does not have, and that is why it is important to him as he grows older. However, the firelight is elusive, and that is why he believes everything he has may vanish.

Firelight can be ambiguous because of its very nature. It is easy to see firelight is fleeting - all you have to do is watch it for a while. As the fire dies down, the firelight dies with it, and so, the firelight can represent different things from beginning to end. Firelight is never the same twice, and that adds to its' ambiguity. In the story, firelight is taken away from the young boy all too quickly, and he sees how uncertain it can be. Just as you are not sure just where you are when you are in that dreamlike state that is like firelight, when you allow yourself to be seduced by the firelight, you are in an uncertain yet somehow comforting world. Warmth is very important in firelight, because the warmth of the fire is part of the hypnotic quality that surrounds firelight. When you are warm, you can become drowsy, and fall into that dreamlike state, and so firelight and dreams are intertwined. That is firelight. It can burn you if you get too close, but it is oh so comforting if you can stay at just the right distance.

I think a good example of people who live in the firelight are old people. Often, when people get very old, they tend to live in their memories, and retreat into times past. They are in their own dream world of thoughts and memories that no one else really understands. Their future is uncertain at best, so they retreat into their past, where the outcome is certain, but dreams can change the facts. My grandfather was like that in the last years of his life. Often he would sit for hours, just staring ahead out of his nearly blind eyes, and he would obviously be lost in thought. He would not talk, but it was easy to see he was thinking about things, and remembering his life past. He could not really tell you what he was thinking about, but it was clear he was in that hypnotic state that comes from warmth, safety, and comfort. I did not understand his silences at the time, and now, it seems as if he had lived a long and good life, and he was eager to remember the good times. When you live in the firelight, you do not have to acknowledge reality, just as the young boy did not want to acknowledge his mother's voice. My grandfather was old, a widower, nearly blind, and dependent on others for his survival. In the firelight, he was young and vital again, and he did not have to face reality.