She had helped run the home while he was building his law practice, and felt that he did not give her enough credit for being a good wife and mother. The couple admitted that they had little to talk about, and lead very separate lives -- Mr. G in his office, and Ms. G with her circle of friends. To reestablish the couple's ability to engage in meaningful dialogue with one another, the counselor first suggested they first make a list of things they had in common and things they did not. Adding to the list of similarities and emphasizing their shared history and interests was essential. Since the couple enjoyed travel and fine food, the counselor suggested going on a 'date night' once a week to a relatively inexpensive, new restaurant, where they would have one another's undivided attention and could try a new type of cuisine or visit a new town.

The couple also received individual 'assignments.' It was suggested that Mr. G think about ways he defined his sense of worth outside of his work as an attorney. Ms. G was encouraged to list ways...

She was encouraged to list marketable skills she had, should she wish to go to work. Ms. G said she would consider registering with a temporary agency, to explore different career possibilities. She was also asked to make a list of things she might like to pursue as new hobbies, or hobbies she had enjoyed in the past, such as golfing and pottery. Having a stronger sense of independent self-worth, the counselor believed, would make both Mr. And Ms. G more effective in their marital roles.
Ground rules were also laid down: such as the number of times Ms. G was 'allowed' to call her son for non-emergencies, and the fact that Mr. G was supposed to come home for dinner every night and to converse with his wife, rather than study paperwork he had taken home from the office. By opening up dialogue and creating times for the couple to engage in meaningful communication, the Gs could get to know one another again, despite the changes they had experienced in their lives since they were newlyweds.