What Makes People Attractive to Others?

Attraction

On Matters of Interpersonal Attraction

For heterosexual undergraduate women, there is quite a bit of information available regarding what your male counterparts find attractive. The first thing a young lady can do for herself in the aim of increasing her levels of attraction to undergraduate males is to do her homework. Undergraduate women of the 21st century are at a great advantage as they have considerable academic resources at their fingertips, quite literally, to assist them in understanding what undergraduate, heterosexual males find most attractive. Undergraduate females should avoid what a number of consumer magazines have to say about males and what they find attractive. Interested females can do a few things, including performing some academic-level research as well as some personal research. There are a number of journals in fields such as psychology, anthropology, sociology, biology, and others that offer valid and useful insights into how males at this state in life select mates and generate sexual attraction. Interested females should additionally ask guy friends well-crafted questions in a comfortable setting so as to get as much information informally as possible. There is value in formal research as well as informal research, such as life experience and the life experiences of peers, after all, there is individual variation in the world. Meaning, not all guys want the same things or have the same personalities, while there are patterns present in certain types of attitudes, including those regarding sexual and emotional attraction.

Ladies should begin by understanding that the male psyche and perspective is in opposition to that of the female perspective and psyche. This should be very clear. This is why having male friends in one's peer group is essential. Male peers can offer the perspective upon a situation or behavior that females inherently lack. With time, females should have a greater sense of the male perspective to the point where they may be able to, with moderate to exceptional success, project themselves into the position of the males they find attractive.

In some respects, women's evaluation of potential mates is the reverse from that of men. This process can be visualized as a series of doors (or windows) nested within one another. For men, potential partners' physical attributes largely determine the pool of partners with whom they desire sexual relations, and this sexual desirability sets the acceptance baseline for higher-investment relationships. Partners' physical attributes thus establish a pool of partners who are acceptable for sexual relations and who may merit further investment. (Townsend & Wasserman, 1998)

Men and women are not wired the same way. Even when they find the same kinds of characteristics attractive, those traits fall in different places among the importance between the sexes. What a female find most attractive or looks for first will likely be different from what the male counterpart does. It is abundantly clear that decision making processes between the sexes differ distinctly. This difference should be taken with gravity and consideration when trying to become more attractive to undergraduate college males.

Undergraduate culture is distinctive. Most undergraduates are enjoying the relative freedom from parents and guardians. People are studying subjects with relative vigor, stimulating and expanding their minds. Undergraduate culture is one of expression, curiosity, and audacity. Undergraduates are more generally inclined to new experiences, including experiences with people. Undergraduate women should know the culture and use it to their advantage. Having an open mind, at least relative to the past, is a strong start. Undergraduates socialize a great deal. While a lot of time is spent in class and spent performing class related duties, most of the time in college is spent among peers outside of class, including in clubs, athletics, parties, events, concerts, in dormitories, and more. Social skills and social intelligence are an advantage for undergraduate women, especially if some of their social skills include a sense of humor. Humor is a strong sign that a person is attractive.

Also, a sense of humor in others appears to be a highly desirable quality & #8230; couples in a relationship who possessed similar senses of humor had higher levels of loving, liking, and predisposition to marry. On the basis of attitudes on dating and marriage, Hewitt (1958) reported that among male and female college students, 90%, and 81%, respectively, considered having a sense of humor to be critical in a potential mate. Morever, Hansen (1977) found that possessing a sense of humor was ranked third out of 33 potential qualities for a relationship, and ranked ninth for a mate. Children who their peers recognize as humorless were liked the least and were less likely to be chosen to attend social activities. (McGee & Shelvin, 2009)

Even if a young woman is not exactly a comedian, she can demonstrate her sense of humor in other obvious ways around the male(s) she finds attractive. This is a sign to the male(s) that she has potential as a short-term and/or a long-term mate. Knowing a few jokes or anecdotes, showing appreciation for humor in others, and laughing (appropriately) in general is a great way to attract an undergraduate male of one's interest.

Finally, while physical attraction is relative and subjective, there are some fundamental aesthetics that can enhance a female's attractive to males. Frankly put, if a young woman wishes to play on the psychology and biology of humans to her advantage, she should wear some red around the male of her choice.

Although it is possible that the red -- sex link is a product of societal conditioning alone, there is reason to believe that it may also have roots in our biological heritage. Many nonhuman female primates display red on their genitals, perineum, chest, or face when nearing ovulation…In sum, red is clearly linked to sex in the context of heterosexual interaction, and this link is viewed as emerging from both societal use of red and a biologically engrained predisposition to red. These two sources may contribute to the red -- sex link in joint fashion. That is, we posit that the societal use of red is not random, but actually derives from the biologically-based predisposition to perceive red as a sexual signal. (Elliot & Niesta, 2008)