Big Brothers Big Sisters Civic Volunteer Reflection Journal

Choosing a Civic Project: Becoming a Big Brother

I decided to become a Big Brother for my civic education project. Big Brothers act as mentors to children. The children in the Big Brothers Big Sisters program frequently lack community and family support structures to help them emotionally and intellectually grow and thrive as they make their way into adolescence. I selected this organization as the focus of my civic education project because mentors played such an important role in my own personal development when I was young. Without good teachers, I do not think I would have gained a sense of the importance of securing a good education or learned to love learning.

Also critical to my growth and development as a person was my family. My family always tried to provide me with enriching circumstances, even when they were financially strained. They made an effort to take me to the library. They enthusiastically supported my various interests and passions as a youngster — spanning from basketball to dinosaurs — and reinforced the idea that my thoughts and dreams were important.

The Big Brother program strives to build self-esteem and a sense that "I matter" in young people who may lack this sense of self-worth because their community does not provide them with opportunities for recreation or personal enrichment. Little Brothers may be the children of single mothers or fathers who have little time, through no fault of their own, to devote to their children. Big Brothers provide positive role models. They show that success in life is possible through hard work. They give a positive sense of who the child can aspire to become within the next few years, offering realistic and meaningful ideals. That is why I hope to become a part of the Big Brother program — as my community gave back to me, I hope to give back to another young person whose community may be lacking in the resources he requires to fully flourish as a human being.

Civic Objectives and the Judeo-Christian Tradition of Service

One cornerstone of the civic education framework at issue is the need to explain the social, political, and moral contributions of America's Judeo-Christian inheritance and to demonstrate that tradition's continued relevance in dealing with contemporary challenges. One cornerstone of modern Christianity is the responsibility the individual has to the community, particularly its least fortunate members. While many observers have noted America's tendency to lack community spirit in pursuit of an intensely individualistic, frontier "Wild West" ethos, America has also produced some of the most self-sacrificing individuals of modern history — among them Martin Luther King Jr. King's vision was rooted in democracy but also in the Judeo-Christian belief system of sacrificing the self for the good of the whole. He believed that placing his own personal security second to the needs of his people was required to uphold American ideals of democracy and make America live up to its stated principles.

I hope, in my own small way, to embody an individualistic vision of morality. I want to help a single younger person feel better about himself and look at society in a more positive light. I hope to help my Little Brother see new opportunities in the world — opportunities of which he was never aware — and find a new sense of personal self-worth. But I also hope to embody King's notion of Christian charity and selflessness. Volunteerism on the part of private organizations is said to be the backbone of American society, an ideal of cohesiveness that stretches all the way back to the Puritan founders, even while it has been tempered by tolerance. I think that volunteering will bring a sense of meaning to my own life as I see another person — younger than myself, part of the next generation and the future — benefit from our association together.

Bowling Alone and the Joy of Genuine Civic Engagement

In terms of this week's readings, I found the material from Bowling Alone particularly compelling in the way it stresses the need for community-minded activity — forming bowling associations, softball teams, and church potlucks, for example — as opposed to going to the gym in a solitary fashion, surfing the Internet to play fantasy football, and eating take-out alone. On the surface, my world and the world of the child I mentor could not seem farther from such a "Leave It to Beaver" type of community. However, I think Robert Putnam has put his finger on a very meaningful truth: civic engagement must be fun, and it must give a sense of joy to both the giver and the receiver. Too many people take on community service as a duty, doing something they might not even enjoy, and the recipient of their charity senses this and may even feel resentful. I think of a time when I volunteered at a soup kitchen with a group of friends as a requirement for one of my high school activities. Our unenthusiastic attitude created a barrier between ourselves and the people we served, making the activity less meaningful even though we were providing food people genuinely wanted.

For my first session with my Little Brother, we played basketball in a local park. It had been a long time since I had played a good game of one-on-one, and even though we were not equally matched, taking time away from work and study to simply enjoy myself — and to be athletic in a way I seldom get the chance to nowadays — was pure, simple fun. My Little Brother sensed my enjoyment, and even though my actions were technically "community service," they did not feel like service but like mutual enjoyment. Putnam's examples show that long ago, volunteering was not a duty but a part of life, like going to church. People did not have to force themselves to join the local bowling league in order to build a better community and help one another feel part of something larger. Bolstering self-esteem in a collective manner through civic engagement was a natural part of life. Joining Big Brothers and rediscovering the pleasures of childhood — having an excuse to spend a day with a ball and a fellow sports fan, if a younger and smaller one — is a good example of truly living Putnam's ideal.

Conclusion: Individualism, Community, and the Work Still to Be Done

I have been thinking a great deal about "An American Morality Tale" by Robert B. Reich given the news I have been reading — that America loves both a tale of the struggle of the individual versus the world, and that of a community coming together behind that individual. The newspapers today contain a great deal of evidence demonstrating that it is impossible for one person to single-handedly eradicate corruption. Although Reich wrote his essay in 1997, his insight that viewing bureaucrats as inherently "bad" can lead to just as many problems as too much bureaucracy seems prophetic.

It is unrealistic to expect too much of oneself or of one's individual efforts. I think that excessive expectation can lead to cynicism, whether you are expecting the government, a private organization, or yourself to change the world quickly. What I try to focus on are small goals and small steps, day by day — for myself and for what I set out to accomplish. Most of the time during my volunteering with my Little Brother, I set out simply to have fun, since fun is often in short supply in his world and he rarely gets the chance just to be a regular kid.

I embarked upon this journey as a Big Brother with the intent of changing a young person's life. I do not know whether I accomplished that, of course — only time will tell as he grows and matures. He must confront challenges including poor schooling, temptations toward negative lifestyle choices, and insufficient emotional and academic support at home. But I do know that I gained a great deal of insight from engaging with someone so different from myself, and I believe he gained some insight into what his dreams for the future might be in the changing America of 2009 and beyond. I think it is always healthy to step outside one's comfort zone and narrow community and engage with others of different ages and backgrounds. My own community has grown larger and richer as a result of my volunteerism.

Being part of Big Brothers Big Sisters highlighted the difficulties of changing the world one person at a time, given all of the obstacles my Little Brother faces in terms of his family life, school, and general environment. Changes are needed that are far greater than any single organization or individual can achieve — for all the rhetoric about American individualism. After all, Frederick Douglass teaching himself to read was a monumental personal achievement, but as great as he was, it took a national effort to eliminate slavery from America, not simply a change of individual minds. That does not mean people should discount the value of community and the power of one individual. Private, spontaneous community volunteerism and government action must work together toward the same aims rather than being polarized against one another.

One thing I have learned from my experiences and readings is that America tends to see the community and the individual, and private and public enterprise, as inexorably opposed. I think that is a mistake. If more people volunteered for organizations like Big Brothers Big Sisters, children would be better prepared to take advantage of the opportunities provided by schools and other public resources. But without government intervention to provide student loans for lower-income students, and without a public investment in schools and programs to educate individuals to meet the challenges of the 21st-century workforce, there is only so much volunteerism can accomplish.