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There are some things that can be done to resolve emotional conflicts, however, and those with good quality communication skills will be aware of these things. Often these kinds of individuals are used as mediators or go-betweens for various disputes so that they can carry messages and beliefs about misunderstandings and opinions back and forth from one person to another (Coleman, 1990). By doing this these individuals are able to say not only what the individual has asked them or told them to pass on to the other individual but also what the first individual was likely trying to say even if it did not come out correctly (Coleman, 1990).
By carrying these messages and understandings back and forth it is possible that an individual with good communication skills can bridge the gap between two others that were having difficulties and therefore resolve the emotional conflict that these people were having with one another (Coleman, 1990). Sometimes, however, there is not someone available to do this type of thing and therefore the individuals who are experiencing the conflict must work it out for themselves. If they are able to sit down and communicate with each other effectively by really listening to what each other is saying and attempting to see the other's point-of-view it is much more likely that they will resolve the conflict (Coleman, 1990). On the other hand, if they simply get angry and insist that the way they want to do things as the only correct way it is likely that they will not resolve any type of conflict because they are not willing to give and take, which is necessary for any good relationship (Coleman, 1990).
Individuals who are good communicators and who are willing to practice their skills will often learn a great deal about other people and about how to defuse many of the conflicts that come up within business and personal relationships (Ellram & Hendrick, 1995). These people are not therapists and they do not talk down to people, treat them condescendingly, or insist that they are listening or that they understand regarding everything that the person says (Ellram & Hendrick, 1995).
Rather, they are more skilled at listening them they are at insisting that they be the one to speak, just as they are more skilled at having a debate with someone them they are at having a fight (Ellram & Hendrick, 1995). These individuals know how to say what needs to he said without coming across as though they are being pompous or that they know more than others (Ellram & Hendrick, 1995).
They are the voice of reason when others are becoming confused and unsure about what to do, and they often receive very little thanks for what they do (Ellram & Hendrick, 1995). It is likely that some of this lack of 'thank yous' from other individuals comes from the fact that many individuals do not realize that anything significant has been done. Because they are not able to communicate in the same way that these effective communicators are they often do not see it as such a strong skill (Ellram & Hendrick, 1995). Others that do see it as a strong skill will likely assume that they are capable of doing the same things and therefore it is not something that needs to be highly praised.
In reality, however, being an effective and good communicator and being able to resolve emotional conflicts simply through communication and the skill that is involved with it is a very difficult thing to do. Those who are capable of doing it well should utilize it as often as they can and help as many people as possible. They can do great things just through the spoken or written word and possibly avoid many of the conflicts, emotional and otherwise, that plague many individuals throughout their lives and seem to come up in business and personal relationships almost on a daily basis.
Without these people that are so good at thoughtful communication and the providing of information, business relationships, and likely personal relationships as well, would have a lot of difficulty. Some of them are not helped, even by good communication, but this communication can be what is lacking in many relationships and therefore is one of the main issues that should be looked at when it comes to correcting problems that society deals with today. It is more important than many people think. The whole world runs on words and when those words are not the right ones, there are significant problems. The only way to solve these problems and emotional conflicts is to teach others to become effective communicators.
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Ellram, L.M. & Hendrick,…[continue]
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