Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant

Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant An individual's perception of family is perhaps the single biggest influencer in identity formation. This is a self-evident truth given the varying personalities of siblings even though they may have been exposed to the same set of familial experiences. Each finds different methods of coping with the gap between the aspiration for an ideal family life and the actual reality of dysfunctional family structures.

This, then, is the relationship between the past and each individual's identity and forms the central theme of Tyler's Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant. Indeed, all other themes in the novel, be it survival, the need for love and belonging, or being homesick, are linked to the central theme of the relationship between the Tull family history and the personalities of each Tull family member.

The Tull family structure falls apart with the departure of Beck, the father, creating the first gap between the aspiration for an ideal family and harsh reality. Pearl, the wife and mother, chooses though to perpetuate the myth of a happy family: "...outsiders would go on believing the Tulls were a happy family. Which they were, in fact... They'd depended only on each other...." (11) Pearl, herself, copes through taking pride in her ability to be capable, strong and independent in bringing up her children (16).

Unfortunately, the pressure of having to play both the father and mother role leads to Pearl increasingly becoming an angry mother, thereby creating the second major gap between the Tull children's perception of the ideal mother and the reality. Pearl is so busy just coping with practical survival that she is blind to the impact of her own role in forming her children's personality till it is too late: "Cody was prone to unreasonable rages; Jenny was so flippant; Ezra really hadn't lived up to his potential...

She wondered if her children blamed her for something...they tended to recall only poverty and loneliness... Cody, in particular, referred continually to Pearl's short temper, displaying it against...childish faces so sad and bewildered...." (22) Evident in Pearl's realization is the fact that all the Tull children had been impacted by their less than ideal family life, with each finding different ways of coping.

Cody grows into a dominating, time-obsessed, rich engineer who, perhaps unconsciously ends up perpetuating the problems created by a dysfunctional family unit, despite his bitterness over "You think we're a family...when we're in particles, torn apart...." (294) Jenny copes through cultivating a witty and animated personality, and believes that despite their childhood, the Tull children survived just fine.

Yet, the impact of the Tull family on Jenny shows through her being withdrawn from those who should be closest to her and her failure at making relationships work: "Names crossed out and added... Dr. Jenny Marie Tull Baines Wiley St.

Ambrose." (187) Ezra persists in attempting to fulfill his belief in family affection, as reflected in his frequent attempts at affectionate reunions and his views on his 'Homesick' restaurant: "He'd serve what people felt homesick for." (122) But, in doing so, Ezra ends up by failing to build relationships, outside of the family circle.