Emotional intelligence in Scazzero's emotionally healthy church model

¶ … Emotionally Healthy Church is a book about the importance of emotionally intelligent church leadership. A healthy Church depends on strong leaders who can introduce the congregation to Biblical principles and serve as role models in the community. Being disconnected with the emotional side of life is an unfortunate by-product of the modern world. Genuine discipleship involves a recognition and appreciation of the emotional components of spirituality. Emotional intelligence involves more than just empathy. It involves self-awareness as a pastor or church leader, with the express goal of eliminating sin and enhancing the power of prayer.

In The Emotionally Healthy Church, Scazzero (2010) provides an overview of why emotional health is important in a church, its leadership, and in a Christian community. The author also offers an emotional and spiritual inventory that can be used for church leaders to assess their current state, which can be useful in recognizing weaknesses and making improvements. According to Scazzero (2010), there are six primary principles of an emotionally healthy church. Those principles include looking beneath the surface, breaking the power of the past, living in brokenness and vulnerability, receiving the gift of limits, embracing grieving and loss, and making incarnation the model for living well. Taken and practiced together, these six principles form a new model of discipleship.

To be emotionally intelligent, a church leader must always be cognizant of the unique needs of the community and congregation and actively seek feedback. Looking deep inside with honesty and praying for truth, the church leader can become aware of faults and failures before they become problems. Addressing and cleaning up the garbage of the past can be helpful for new leaders seeking major transformations in their churches, especially when trying to correct the wrongdoings or errors of past preachers. Always being willing to surrender to the grace of God remains the cornerstone of an emotionally healthy church.

Reflection

Reading the first half of The Emotionally Healthy Church, was surprised at how much I could relate to the examples of ministers who had not recognized the importance of emotional intelligence in their leadership or in their personal relationships with others in the community. Our culture teaches us that emotions interfere with reason, which can be true in some cases, but that does not negate the importance of emotions in our lives. In fact, spirituality has a strong emotional component evident in the fervency of prayer and the feelings people have when walking the path of Christ.

Had I been tutored or mentored by leaders who were more emotionally competent, I might have avoided some of the problems I have encountered. For example, I have had problems expressing myself. I sometimes get frustrated when others do not understand me right away, and can be prone to anger. Instead of struggling, I could have become more attuned to my needs without sacrificing empathy for others. Until this point in my life and career, I have considered emotions as something that remains at home or kept secret or silent. Now I see how this approach of suppressing or hiding emotions can be seriously harmful to me personally, to my family, and to my community.

This book has helped me understand where I came from, where I am now, and what I can do immediately to achieve my goals. The six principles integrate emotional intelligence with the Christian worldview, showing how daily emotional encounters and experiences can be reframed with a Biblical perspective. I appreciated the way the author relates emotional intelligence to secular as well as religious issues, which helps me to introduce these concepts into sermons.

Application

One of the best things about Scazzero's The Emotionally Healthy Church is that it has a pragmatic component. Far from being "soft" because it is about emotions, the text encourages tough love, practiced in terms of attitudes toward self-discipline and also in terms of interacting with colleagues and members of the congregation. The main insights, techniques, word pictures, and tools I have gained from reading this book can be applied in my future career and spiritual life.

For example, I have gained significant insight into my faulty emotional responses to situations that injured my delicate ego. Rather than struggle or beat myself up over the way I feel or respond, I can pray and use the techniques Scazzero (2010) recommends such as willingness to be humble and weak in order to gain strength. The Bible teaches us about the importance of humility, as Jesus embodied this aspect of emotional intelligence. Whenever I feel in doubt of how to handle powerful or intense emotions, I can pray for solutions and re-read not only Bible sections but also chapters of this book.

Using the spiritual and emotional assessment tool contained in The Emotionally Healthy Church will also help my colleagues run a successful Christian organization. By renewing our mission and vision statements, our church can play a stronger and more meaningful role in the community. Just like the example that Scazzero gives from Kingsolver's novel The Poisonwood Bible, I need to take the time to listen to what my congregation has to say and refuse the tendency to be arrogant when in a position of leadership. The tools and techniques offered to change my attitude focus on the theme of discipleship, which is reiterated throughout The Emotionally Healthy Church.

A true disciple is one who recognizes weakness and takes responsibility for sin and straying from the path of God. We are not perfect beings, but we can strive for the ideals that Christ represented and wants for us. To develop a plan for successful personal and professional change, I would do well to continually assess my emotional state and how I am interacting with others. My relational style varies too much, as sometimes when I feel good about myself and am in a good mood, all communications flow smoothly. On the contrary, I have been too prone to mood swings and other problems that can be resolved with simple steps like working well with others.

Reference

Scazzero, P. (2010). The Emotionally Healthy Church. Grand Rapids: Zondervan.