Inch Tall, Life Would Be

¶ … inch tall, life would be very different. Starting the moment I woke up, I would have to figure out how to get out of my bed because it would be the same height to me as a two story building. In fact, just getting out from under my blanket would be a challenge. Hopefully, I would be able to use the blanket to slide down to the floor. Getting out of my room would be impossible if my door were closed because I would have no way of reaching the doorknob; luckily, my mother always opens my door when it is time for me to get up.

If we still had a cat, I might be in real trouble but my dog is friendly to small animals. Still, he might accidentally throw me across the room trying to sniff me the way he did when we introduced him to my friend's ferret once. Hopefully, if he recognized my scent and my voice he would still listen to me instead of treating me like a toy or a small animal he wanted to play with. It is also a good thing we don't have any bugs in our house because a spider or a cockroach would be enormous compared to me; they would be at least the size of huge dog; a water bug would be the same size as me and as frightening as a monster from a 1950s science fiction movie.

My mother would probably have a heart attack if I just walked into the kitchen so I would probably try to climb my way up to the lowest telephone in the house. I would then reach up to push the receiver off the cradle being very careful not to let it fall on me and crush me. I would crawl onto the number pad and dial my mother's kitchen line or her cell phone and when she answered I would try to explain that I woke up a little bit "different" this morning. At least if I could explain it to her before she saw me, maybe she wouldn't freak out as badly when she saw me.

Assuming my mother survived the sight of me, I think she would let me stay home from school and take me to the doctor or something to find out what happened to me. Since there would be no way for me to use the bathroom, I would probably ask for a plastic bottle cap with a little water in it and I would ask my mother to put the bottle cap with me on the floor of the closet for some privacy. I don't think I'd be too comfortable showering in front of her, even if I were only an inch tall, so I would ask her to cut me a small piece of towel and put me in the tub under a very light shower and I would make sure the drain screen was in so that I wouldn't accidentally get sucked down the drain with the water. For breakfast, I would probably ask her to just give me a single Cheerio and I would probably need her to crush it up for me since it would be the size of a truck tire to me and I would have no way of cutting it since the smallest knife we have would be the size of a telephone pole to me.