Interpersonal manipulation: psychological mechanisms and effects

Manipulation in Never Let Me Go

Manipulation is a relatively dark part of interpersonal relationships that occurs when the manipulator has certain motivations or inner uncertainties. It generally stems from a feeling of insecurity or other forms of unhappiness. The manipulation process is then used to overcome or overshadow these feelings. According to Handelamn (2009, p. 45), "manipulation is not exactly coercion or persuasion or deception." Instead, according to the author, it lies somewhere inbetween the three mentioned actions. This is why manipulation can occur in so many different forms and manifestations. Ruth's actions in Never Let me Go, for example, take a particularly aggressive aspect when she constantly bullies Kathy and Tommy to do what she wants. By the end of the novel, however, her actions clearly stem from a deep sense of uncertainty based upon the fact that she is a clone rather than a person in her own right.

Manipulation can be distinguished from influence, in that the latter recognizes and adheres to the rights and boundaries of others, whereas the former does not (Simmonds Publications, 2014). Clearly, Ruth has no regard for the rights and boundaries of Kathy and Tommy. This stems form her own sense of being disregarded in terms of human rights and boundaries. As a clone, Ruth exists in the service of humanity, rather than as a person in her own right. She deals with the psychological damage she experiences as a result by manipulating others in a particularly aggressive and negative way. This lack of a sense of self is one of the primary traits of manipulators (Simmonds Publications, 2014).

Another trait of those with a tendency to manipulate others is poor interpersonal relationships (Austin et al., 2007, p. 186). Academics and psychologists refer to this type of manipulation as "Machiavellianism." Ruth has little or no interpersonal skills and no desire to express herself more positively. With her words and actions, she aims to manipulate and wound. In this sense, she is almost a psychopath, with no sense of the basic morality and interpersonal skills that most human beings have.