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I learned that if my husband and I just start by giving up on simple things, we would be able to take more time out for ourselves. In love we have got to give up on keeping scores, only then we can build compassion and connection towards each other.
Reflection
The main areas discussed in this book ask for one to change their thinking and behavior in order to work things out with their partner. The two people in the marriage bond must be the same however, with the passage of time situations change and you can't get the same attention and love which you once had.This process is natural, as along with the increase in number of years you have been with your husband there is an increase in the responsibilities as well. Since I did have many problems with my marriage, I felt this book to be quite helpful. I noticed that in the book the author cites Jesus and bible terms; however no one is perfect in this world. The secrets of a great marriage are described in this book for which one must be perfect. I do not disagree or contradict with the suggestions made in the book. Though, a question comes to my mind that what suggestions would have been provided to those people who do not agree with author's point-of-view. There is a high possibility that many people would disagree with the ideas presented in the book as there are lots of people who do not like to change themselves. Not everyone has the heart of sacrificing their needs in order to satisfy the needs of their spouse. Thus, I would conclude that since mankind is associated with imperfection thus, we can't compare ourselves with Jesus.
Application
Cloud and Townsend (2008) discuss the aspect...
A lot of people merely choose to get married just because they think that their life will become perfect after they get married. I see a lot of my friends getting jealous and envious of my life just because they think that I'm married so therefore, I am happy.
This was one expectation that I had before I got married. Just like everyone else, I believed that marriage is fairytale and there is no pain in this process. After going through this experience, I feel that this relationship gives me quite different experiences. This was something I was not prepared for before. But now, I have learnt that in a marriage, one has to be prepared to be disappointed, hurt, angry, lonely, unhappy along with being happy and content with your life. Only after numerous fights and arguments with my husband, I have been able to conclude that married life is not perfect. After going through my experiences and reading this book, I have come to terms with reality. I have seen that marriage is a salad bowl full of different sorts of experiences, troubles and feelings. This book therefore has taught me to not only be patience but accept the facts as well. As mentioned earlier, I used to get extremely agitated when my husbands focused on his entertainmentgadgets more. However, I have come to realize that is his hobby. It is an interest and I should accept it as a part of my married life. Therefore, I will hope to reduce my expectations and learn to be more accepting of my situation.
References
Cloud, H. And Townsend, J. (2006). Simple Secrets of a Great Marriage. Nashville, Tenneesse: Thomas Nelson.
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