Stress and Family Life

¶ … families today: Time management and the absence of free time

One of the most challenging issues facing modern families is the lack of time both parents and children have for leisure-based activities. Two-career households are increasingly common and parents are challenged with the need to balance longer work hours with their desire to spend quality time with their children. There is also often friction between the need to balance housework and work obligations between husbands and wives. It is estimated that only 19% of husbands perform housework on a daily basis, compared with 49% of wives. Regarding dinner preparation, 43% of men prepare food or clean while 68% of women do so (Sifferlin 2014).

Children are far more likely to engage in scheduled activities than in the past. These pursuits require a greater time commitment on parents to take them from place to place. There is little ability for children to explore the world independently in a free and unstructured manner: even children have tight schedules. As one father said: "My wife and I work, so we don't have the luxury of supervising our daughters' free time around the clock. These activities, while sometimes costly, give us some peace of mind" since he believes children should not wander around unsupervised (Feiler 2013). Thus, because of the new structure of family life and the expectations placed both upon children and on parents, both have less time for one another and children have less personal time to determine their own interests and passions. There is also less time for quality bonding not spent in a car while children are ferried from one activity to the next.

A recent study of teachers found that more than half were under the impression that "children spent a lot less time with their families than they did 20 years ago" (Sellgren 2014). In terms of the reasons for this, "the vast majority (94%) said the main reason for this is parents working, while 92% blamed the use of technology" (Sellgren 2014). However, the latter two issue go hand-in-hand, given that the presence of technology has made 'connecting' with the office far easier for parents and technology offers a safe babysitter, allowing children to be occupied by a screen while they can be safely supervised. Smartphones and iPads seem like useful ways to multitask and get things done while still taking care of business or amusing children but there is a cost in terms of human interaction.

The result is increased stress at home for all parties. Fewer families even have time to have a family meal together, which a number of experts have seen as part of the obesity problem, given the reliance upon meals consumed in a car, versus in a civilized fashion. Children who have meals with the family are "24% more likely to eat healthier foods and 12% less likely to be overweight" (Cook & Dunifon 2012: 1). A lack of time combined with an increased use of electronics creates a sense of family disconnection and also can deprive both children and adults of important tools in terms of interacting with one another and amusing one's self in a less passive fashion than screen time.