Bridging Communication Styles in U.S.-Mexican Business

Introduction: Two Cultures, Two Communication Styles

In Management in Two Cultures, author Eva S. Kras discusses many differences between Mexican and U.S. cultures and their effects on business dealings. She describes differences in cultural values, customs, and attitudes that lead to misunderstandings when the two countries meet in the workplace. Perhaps most significant are communication styles, which are learned through socialization in childhood and are so habitual to both cultures that they almost go unnoticed. The work of Deborah Tannen (1995) on feminine and masculine communication styles provides a useful framework for examining the differences in the communication styles of Mexicans and Americans.

Masculine and Feminine Communication: Tannen's Framework

Tannen argues that American girls and boys are socialized so differently that they almost grow up in two separate cultures. Socialization begins at birth. For example, when we hold baby girls, we position them so that they can look directly into our faces as we talk to them. Boys, on the other hand, we hold so that they face outward and can see what is going on in the room. By the time children are old enough to play with each other, a great deal of socialization has already taken place. Little boys like to play outdoors in groups, usually with a leader who gives orders. They are drawn to competitive games with lots of rules. Little girls, on the other hand, prefer to play indoors, usually in very small groups or with just one other girl. They like to do things together — coloring, playing jacks, or playing with dolls. Girls tend toward activities they can share rather than competitive games with a winner and a loser.

But it is not simply a matter of divergent interests. The goals of communication are different for each. Males and females communicate for different reasons and to accomplish different ends. Boys and men function and communicate within a context of social hierarchy — a structured social system in which some people give orders and others take them. The goal in masculine communication is to be at the top, not the bottom. Consequently, there is a ceaseless struggle for ascendance. If you are down, you want to be up. If you are already up, you must constantly guard against others who would like to take your place. In the masculine communication style, men are averse to being put down. Bragging becomes a way to avoid this. They dislike taking orders because this places them in a subordinate position, and they are expected not to show weakness or emotion, since that signals low rather than high standing in the hierarchy.

Feminine communication style, conversely, functions within the context of a social network. Women aim for connection and intimacy. In order to maintain connection with each other, a sense of equality must be constantly fostered — nobody is better than anybody else. Women relate to each other in ways that maximize their similarities and minimize their differences, sharing personal experiences and mutually exploring their meaning. If the sense of connection is broken, a woman may become a social outcast. Girls in school who become social isolates are often prettier or smarter than the other girls; they become outcasts precisely because they stand out too much.

The two communication styles represent different views of reality. It is not that men never think about relationships or that women are never concerned about achievement and independence. Both look at the same situation but focus on different aspects. Masculine style says, "We are separate and distinct from each other." Feminine style says, "We are connected and similar; our experiences are alike." In Talking from 9 to 5, Deborah Tannen (1995) describes the implications for the workplace, where feminine style is often at a disadvantage. When women talk to each other about their families or workplace troubles, for example, men may misinterpret the conversation as chronic complaining, a need for advice, or an inability to handle problems. In the feminine communication style, the goal of such talk is to establish rapport, not to seek solutions.

Mexican Culture and the Feminine Communication Style

Management in Two Cultures describes one culture that employs a masculine style of communication (American) and another (Mexican) that employs a feminine style. In the Mexican workplace, consistent with feminine communication style, the human element is more important than accomplishing tasks or "getting to the point." Family comes before work. Mexican children, like children raised in traditionally feminine social environments, are expected to obey, to be pleasant, to work things out, and to avoid conflict. They are socialized in school to conform and thus maintain a sense of equality. Meanwhile, American men who arrive in Mexico practice a predominantly masculine style of communication, in which independence, competitiveness, aggressiveness, and individuality are highly prized and place a person higher in the social hierarchy. The two styles are bound to clash — especially when compounded by the language barrier, which amplifies differences in educational outlook: the broad, theoretical, and artistic perspective of Mexicans (a "feminine" view of reality) versus the narrow, specialized, analytical, and practical perspective of Americans (a "masculine" view).

According to cross-cultural communication research, these deeply embedded stylistic differences frequently generate friction in multinational workplaces, even when both parties share goodwill and professional intent.