We as humans have been programmed in a way so as to believe that the morally and socially expectable pattern of marriage remains to be monogamy. But let's first define what we actually mean by monogamy. What this concept really means is to have just one sexual partner at a time or more appropriately, having just one life partner. This may refer to being with one person in your entire life or at least one person at a time.
For much of the history of mankind, this has been a default relationship that one is supposed to follow. Some ancient cultures did have other practices such as polygamy or bigamy but this was just the preferable pattern of things. The concept of monogamy evolved so as to provide a balanced life to the children, as they would have a better life if both the parents had a certain amount of contribution in bringing them up and they had someone to look up to. Having a mother and a father was simpler and more clear cut and it was noticed that any intruder into the relationship or any problems that existed had quite a lot of impact on the children and this created an imbalanced socialization process for them. Hence, it was established that monogamy was the perfect relationship and that should be kept intact in order to have a perfectly balanced and stable society..
However, this concept is slowly losing its significance in our societies today. People have become increasingly involved in the fast paced lives and somehow indulge in fulfillment of sexual desires outside their monogamous marriage rather than considering the implications that would have on those around them. It is however common to see today that monogamy is losing its significance and people are indulging in other forms of relationships.
The loss of the significance of monogamy
This concept is however, losing its appeal and the balance that it once created. This is because more promiscuity is now prevailing in society and the need for the fulfillment of sexual desires is much stronger. People have increasingly started stressing on their own needs and being selfish when it comes to taking up responsibilities. The parents have put the children and their lives on the back end and do not exactly consider what the implications of their actions might be on their children. Instead they focus on living their life to the full neglecting the important things in life.
Monogamy was the preferred pattern of marrying and entering a relationship in order to diminish the amount of promiscuous behavior in society. If monogamous relationships were stressed enough, it was believed that people would understand the reasons for which it was considered the norm and would think twice before entering another relationship because it was looked down upon in society . The need to have a balance in the society is realized and today it is quite common to see some social problems that exist which are solely there because of the fact that no one seems to care enough anymore. People do not think twice anymore before engaging in any other relationship and although this has been the case since a long time, it is becoming more common today.
Extra marital affairs are increasingly common today and that gives rise to the number of divorces and separations that are common today. Empty shell marriages are one of the reasons why the youth of the country is so disturbed because they do not attain a proper balanced life at home and feel the need to vent out their frustrations and miseries in life elsewhere because they feel they cannot trust their parents anymore as they are selfish towards them.
A number of countries have seen recent rise in the statistics of prostitution and paid sex. This is because people can no longer control their sexual desires. What they are unable to gain at home, they seek elsewhere and that has long lasting implications. It is also about the fact that people have definitely become less understanding and the concept of compromise has been eliminated in society. People tend to consider drastic measures on petty issues and instead of seeking to resolve the matters with love and understanding, they do not think twice before entering another relationship. The extra marital affairs where one or both of the partners are married but are still seeking sexual pleasures outside marriage tend to become one of the most poisonous aspects towards a stable marriage.
The only reason why polygamy and more than one marriage were allowed was to balance out the number of men and women in the world. There are also certain integral aspects that one needs to consider before getting involved in more than one relationship because at the end of the day, it is quite difficult to manage and have an equal stance in both the relationships. Considering on the basis of moral grounds, it is known that every human has an innate tendency to get jealous and to feel insecure. This prevents the space that one can provide their spouse for having another relationship with someone else and this usually results in a chaos.
For a child as well, it is quite bizarre and unusual for him or her to be okay with their parents having more than one relationship and having children from another spouse. It creates a natural ground for conflict, jealousy and it is rarely ever seen that the children would be able to manage with their parents being involved elsewhere apart from their own biological parents.
The concept of monogamy and the importance associated with it was quite high in the conventional societies but it is largely losing its value since people are increasingly indulging elsewhere and do not regard those relationships. This is one reason why people have started accepting prostitution in society and the taboo is becoming much more widespread. They cannot just stay with one person and depend on them for every aspect of their life. Even if an individual stays with their spouse because they have children together, it does not necessarily mean that they still have that bond of love anymore and when that feeling vanishes from the relationship, it becomes empty and meaningless which causes the person to physically be involved and may support that family, but eventually the need for having a meaningful relationship that will fulfill their emotional and moral needs arises.
Consideration of poly relationships
Due to the declining importance of monogamous relations, people are now entering into open relationships where there are no strings attached and both the members of the relationship agree that there is no restriction on the other of being involved in another relationship. Although, people claim to be okay with this kind of arrangement and prefer to jump into a situation of polygamy, is it really acceptable in society?
We as humans have a tendency to label and react towards what we see and feel. Considering the situation of polygamy, it may be happening in both ways, a man being involved with a number of women or a single woman having a relationship with a lot of men. But what are the moral grounds for the social acceptance? Society will still at some point raise questions on them both and the implications will obviously be higher for the woman. It may be considered okay for a man to have a polygamous relationship but a woman will have bad labels attached to her for being in such a situation. It is also important to realize that with the deteriorating significance of monogamy, promiscuity tends to rise and people consider it okay to break the marriage or be involved in a number of relations. It complicates things for the people involved as well as the others in their lives. A monogamous relationship where the person tends to know who they have to spend their entire life with is much simpler and morally correct.
In some situations, the polygamous arrangement might work out as the children have more than two parents to consult when they have a problem and they get the environment of a household in not just one place. But such cases are still rare. A monogamous relationship would be less straining and emotionally challenging for the children as well as those involved in them.
Conclusion and Assessment
It has pretty much been established that the societies that exist today and the people today cannot just stick to one relationship and need to seek pleasures elsewhere because they believe that they simply cannot get a balance of everything in one relationship only. There obviously is also a higher extent of such polygamous relationships nowadays but the end point remains that for various moral, social, financial and emotional reasons, monogamy is still the most widely accepted form of relationships and is still the one that is most preferable form.