Changes Writing Is Communication. It Is Essential

¶ … Changes

Writing is communication. It is essential in business to get a message across, but also should be not only industry and/or audience specific, but should communicate the message intended in the most appropriate manner. Communication does not work if it is not understood, and part of the process of understanding is being able to focus the message properly. At times, certain professions mix jargon, technical terms, and usage that is either inappropriate or outside the level of the audience. Without explanations, the message is lost and communication fails.

The accounting memo in question was written from an accountant to another accountant, and was designed to explain the processes of Last In/First Out (LIFO) and First In/First Out (FIFO). In general, we find three general areas of concern if this memo was to be sent to the Executive Vice President of the company:

Information to Include or Omit -- For an executive, information not germaine to the issue should be omitted, any references to meetings, etc. The memo should be more succinct, to the point, and without any extraneous information that would not be of interest at the executive level.

Jargon and/or personal langauge -- Jargon may be understood by accountants, but should be defined for a more general audience. While it is likely that the Vice President has some background, a busy executive should not need to stumble through text in order to make sense of the material. Any indication of personal information (we need to get together this week, etc.) should be removed.

Audience and Repurcussions -- Using an approach to writing that is strategic and focuses on communication intent is vital in modern business. Executives do not have time to waste reading through documents without cogent, pointed material. Often, bullet points of highlights are the best way to get the point across, then explain materials later or in an Appendix, to be used if necessary. In essence, this is simple: "The idea behind an audience-strategy approach is simple: always focus your message on the needs and goals of your audience" (COM Job Search, 2004).

Critique

Phrase

Issue

Suggestion

"We need to get together later this week…."

Personal, unrelated to issue

Omit

"It is possible we might recommend"

Vague, says nothing to management

Either recommend or do not recommend

"As you know, choosing"

Assumption, does everyone know?

State it without codicils

FIFO/LIFO

Vague

Be more precise

"No matter which method"

Lacks focus and decision

Executives want sound recommendations

"We need to keep in mind"

Literary, discursive

Simply state the fact

"Did you see the news"

Personal and redundant

Omit

Rewritten Memo-

Tom Executive, VP Operations

Andrew Accountant, Senior Project Manager

SUBJECT:

LIFO/FIFO ISSUES

During inflationary times it is important to reduce capital expenditures and federal and state tax burden as much as possible. Similarly, it is important that our Cost of Goods Sold be monitorited closely since it is likely it will increase along with inventory costs.

The choice of Last In/Fist Out (LIFO) or First In/First Out (FIFO) in inventory management has a robust effect on inventory and Profit and Loss. However, we do have a two-pronged recommendation for management and suggest that Strategic Planning and Operations offer the most likely prediction of the next 12-18 months.

1) If costs remain stable and the economy levels out, we recommend we move to LIFO. It reflects lower income and will reduce our tax liability.

2) If costs increase, our recommendation is to remain with the FIFO plan. This is our best guess scenario.

Additionally, because our company has an elastic price structure, whichever method chosen will need to be duplicated in both inventory management and financial reporting. Thank you for your time, please let me know if I may provide additional information.

Issue

Original

Rewrite

Number of words

Number of sentences

16

10

Average words per sentence

22.25

18.10

Gunning Fog

13.28

15.20

Grade Level

11.13

12.20

Reading Ease

52.12

39.43

The Gunning Fog index gives us the approximate number of years of formal education one needs to understand the text, with Grade Level as a back up. The Reading Ease score indicated difficulty of prose, with scores 50-60 understood by High School and undergraduate college students, 30-40 by upper level college students, and below 30, university or advanced degree individuals. Both the original and the rewritten version are written at the upper level of High School for verbiage, grammar and prose. However, the rewrite is significantly shorter (by over 40%) and more elevated in reading ease, which is likely appropriate for the intended audience (Readability Calculator, 2010).