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Communication
Jane Lee's letter to the Human Resources Department at XYZ Solution is not effective and is unlikely to pique their interest. The letter has grammar errors that make it appear sloppy. There is too much superfluous information. The letter also does not take the audience's needs into account, and lacks the classic appeals of good persuasive writing -- logos, pathos and ethos.
The first thing Ms. Lee needs to do is to clean up the spelling and grammar. Capitalizing something like "math" and using the ampersand in mid-sentence conveys that the writer lacks professionalism. There is a word that does not exist ("flaure") and as a result a nonsensical sentence. There are other mistakes as well, and Ms. Lee will need to make significant revisions to make this a professional-caliber cover letter.
However, there are many other faults that make this an ineffective cover letter. Ms. Lee does not appear to recognize that a cover letter is an audience-centric piece of writing. Her cover letter is focused on herself...
While to an extent this must be necessary, talking about oneself in a cover letter needs to be done in such a way as to sell the applicant to the company. Ms. Lee does not outline any of her qualifications, instead mentioning attributes that are irrelevant. This hurts her if the company is using a robot to scan the cover letter for keywords because nothing she wrote will bring up a hit. Even if the company's human resources department in run by professionals who know better than to rely on keyword searches, Ms. Lee's letter offers them nothing they are looking for, like skills, education and experience. Better awareness of the audience would allow Ms. Lee to write a better letter that has more appeal to the end user. Indeed, the letter's emphasis on superfluous information that does not relate to the job -- or any job -- will make this an ineffective cover letter no matter who is reading it.
Another fault with this letter is that it fails to make use of the common rhetorical appeals. A cover letter is,…
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