Sign Up Now
Get instant access to over 1 million+ study documents
OR
Already registered? click here to login
By creating your account, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and student honor code.
Emotionally Competent Children:
A lesson for soon-to-be parents
Children learn basic emotional skills from relatives, neighbors, and peers, but by far the most important role in a child's emotional development is that of his parents. Parents have the unique role of providing guidance and instruction to facilitate healthy emotional development in their children from the time they are born. Thus, parents should be proactive in coaching their children to appropriately handle a wide variety of feelings and emotions. Moreover, parents should lead by example, modeling emotionally healthy interactions between each other and with their children on an ongoing basis, particularly when family conflict arises (Gottman & Declaire, 15-16).
Research has shown support for a five-step process to effectively instill emotional intelligence in children. Gottman & Declaire (1998) state that the following five-step approach should be applied at the time an emotional challenge arises:
Identify and recognize the child's emotion.
In order to raise an emotionally competent child, it is necessary to become aware of the child's emotions in the first place. It is only upon your identifying the emotion of your child, that you can help him to respond accordingly. This entails being in tune...
Approach the emotional situation as a teaching and bonding opportunity.
It is important to truly get to know your child and develop intimacy, if she is going to be receptive to your parental coaching. Rather than argue or ignore what may appear to be irrational emotions on the part of your child, take the time to develop meaningful connection with her. Viewing the situation as a teaching moment will lessen your own anxiety about the situation, and will allow you to break down the problem.
3. Listen empathetically, validating the child's feelings.
A parent's validation of what the child is feeling helps the child to accept his own feelings, which is a necessary precursor to resolving the feeling. When people, particularly children, feel that their emotions are being understood and accepted, the feelings lose their power and begin to subside. This validation of the child's emotions is not synonymous with endorsing those emotions. Validation is merely acknowledging the existence of his emotions in order to move forward. It also means resisting the urge to simply erase unpleasant emotions.
4. Help the child to verbally articulate the emotion she is feeling.
When a child talks…
References
Gottman, J. & Declaire, J. (1998) Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child: The Heart of Parenting. New York: Simon & Shuster.
Markham, L. (2012). How to Raise an Emotionally Competent Child. Retrieved from http://www.ahaparenting.com
This often creates a frustrating situation within the home, as children and parents may clash over these ideas. Of course, cultural issues are not the only differences in parenting in the United States. Phegley (2009) states that parents can easily identify what they want in their relationships with their children -- they wan the best. The best, she argues, "is entirely up to an individual's perception" (para. 2). Thus, parents
Understanding others is crucial to developing empathy; that is, knowing how others feel about things. Compassion comes when empathy develops. Young children can learn to identify feelings by looking at pictures that reveal happiness, anger, sadness, etc. The parent or caregiver can point these out and also comment on the child's feelings as they arise. "You look sad. Is it because you have to stop playing and take a
Yet warm, trusting relationships with adults are required if moral and spiritual guidance is to be reclaimed. (167) The church is perhaps the only institution with the beliefs, literature, liturgy, practices, social structure and authority (diminished though it be) necessary to rescue children from the violence and other deforming features of late 20th-century life. But it cannot accomplish this by simply laying the faith before young people and inviting them
raising children in single parent homes and dual parent homes. The writer explores the differences and the similarities between the two homes and uses three sources to identify each category. Children in Dual Parent and Single Parent Homes In today's world there are as many children living in homes of single parents as there are children living in homes with two parents. It has become so commonplace that it is not
Responsible for Raising Children Who's Responsible for Raising Children's Children? High school day care centers criminalize our Society Each year majority of the teenage girls are becoming pregnant. Majority of the high schools have observed this statistic and therefore they are trying to introduce day care facility for the babies. Teen pregnancy is something which should not be promoted while on the other hand facilitating young girls by providing day care facility is
Child Guidance The Watertown (MA) Family Network creates a community for mothers who may not have anyone to ask questions about their infants and toddlers. As the video's narrator stated, "There are no roadmaps to raising children." With the Network, which is free and provides resources such as a new mom support group, parents do not need to feel as if they are all alone with this rewarding, but challenging, job