Rejected Child Characteristics Causes and Effective Treatment Strategies

Rejected Children

Up to 15% of children can be classified as being rejected or rejected-aggressive based on their difficult peer relationships (464). Rejected children exhibit a number of behaviors and characteristics ranging from anxiety and conceit to withdrawal and aggression. Excessive dependence on adults, bitterness or sarcasm toward others, and social indifference are also features of rejected children's behaviors (464). Rejected children are often underachievers who do poorly in school and might develop learning disabilities. In particular, when rejected children show signs of aggression, they tend to experience severe adjustment problems in school or with peers. Rejected-aggressive children exhibit a tendency to be argumentative and disruptive in school and demonstrate a lack of control over their aggressive reactions. In fact, the rejected child may expect or even perceive positive feedback from their behavior and therefore overestimate their social competence. Rejected-aggressive children perceive their actions as being appropriate to the situation. Moreover, rejected-aggressive children often misconstrue the actions or words of others as being threatening or hostile and react with corresponding aggression: they overperceive others' aggression and underperceive their own (465). Because of the nature of their behavior, the sense of rejection is reinforced and the child will often feel lonely and isolated in social situations. However, in many cases a rejected-aggressive child will bond with other peers who demonstrate and reinforce similar behaviors. At home, rejected-aggressive children are more likely to talk back to their parents or retaliate if physical punishments are used. If these behaviors or tendencies are ignored or unchecked, they may persist into adolescence and lead to serious social problems.

The causes of rejected-aggressive behavior include poor parental relationships, especially poor relationships with the father. The use of physical punishment is linked with rejected-aggressive behaviors, as the child is likely to imitate the parents' aggressive behavior at home and with peers. Also, parents of rejected-aggressive children tend to use verbal threats and are more likely to initiate aggression at home. Another cause of rejected-aggressive behavior is peer modeling: rejected-aggressive kids are likely to hang out with other rejected-aggressive kids and the behavior builds upon itself through reinforcement and imitation. Violence in the media may also be a causal factor of rejected-aggressive behavior, and genetics could be a factor as well.