Five Types of Drivers: A Personality Study

Introduction: Driving as Personality

There are numerous different types of drivers. On some days, any single individual can manifest the characteristics of all these driver types, or at least a good deal of them. In many ways, driving can be considered one of the key distinguishing features of someone's personality. There was a lyric in a song once that captured this idea: you can tell people's styles by the way they park a car. If the styles and personalities of drivers can be determined by the way in which they manipulate a moving two-ton piece of steel, metal, and plastic, then it is no small wonder that the world is in as much trouble as it is.

The Cab Driver

First and foremost, we have the ubiquitous cab driver, operating synonymously in every city in every state, while seeming to thrive in metropolises and other cramped places where the value of cars is considerably higher than that of pedestrians. Key distinguishing trademarks of cab drivers are, first, that they speed up at the sight of oncoming pedestrians, bicyclists, or anyone else without their own two-ton defense from these road warriors.

In truth, this tendency may be largely reflective of their source of income—they are constantly prowling for passengers. However, this does not account for their inexplicably high speeds in narrow spaces, such as when abruptly switching lanes or when encountering daily occurrences like morning or evening traffic while someone is crossing the street. It does not matter what color the light is, whether or not there is a stop sign, or any other traffic law to obey. Cab drivers unerringly speed up and brake as an afterthought when there is pretty much anything (even other cars) spotted in their path.

If they must yield to some sort of traffic law, they will settle for merely unnerving the passenger or giving the willies to some helpless pedestrian. In virtually any city, cab drivers make it known that they, and no one else, have the right of way.

The Running Late Driver

Next, you have the "running late" driver, which is an unfortunately routine phenomenon when someone has neglected the decency of leaving home or work a mere five to ten minutes earlier to ensure arrival at a selected destination in a timely fashion. These drivers usually appear during rush hour traffic in the mornings, during the evening traffic blitz, and occasionally on the weekends when circumstances demand urgency.

Running late drivers will seize every opportunity they can summon to advance ahead of the next driver, regardless of how far they get. Character traits include weaving in and out of lanes multiple times to leapfrog a car or two, and doing a brutal job on the brakes when they come screeching to a halt at the impeding sight of a red light. The yellow lights, of course, get ignored as though they were any other color but red, and the amount of velocity these drivers muster on residential streets or interstate highways is uniform—maximum speed to their destination.

The Hater Driver

Then you have what can best be termed the "hater driver," whose only apparent purpose for being on the road at any hour in which they are spotted is to get in the way of people who actually have places to go. These are the drivers who go 65 in the fast lane, blissfully oblivious to all the honking and attempts of others to pass them. When they do happen to get flipped off by someone zooming 85 miles per hour in front of them, they shrug and note that they're "only going the speed limit."

Somehow, these drivers have an uncanny knack for knowing just how much to speed up to narrow the distance between you and the car in front of you so that you cannot pass them. Or, they have the gall to actually slow down with you when they are in, say, the middle lane, and you desperately want to get around them. You might even spot one swerving in and out of both lanes on a two-lane highway, just for spite, to ensure that whoever happens to be behind them stays that way. These drivers have no other objective than to take up space and make sure that whoever else is on the road with them cannot achieve what they are attempting to—or has to wait on the haters first.

Conclusion: What Drivers Reveal

One of the funniest aspects of these "now you see me, now you don't" drivers is that they themselves can oftentimes exhibit the traits of all the other driver types mentioned in this discourse. These police officers can run plenty of red lights, break all types of speed laws, slow down, speed up, and do whatever else they please while on the road whenever it suits their fancy. They have certainly been known to cut other drivers off while switching lanes in dangerous trajectories—although it should be stated that in most instances, their actions are rarely contested and almost never followed by any sort of confrontation.