Introduction The United Methodist Church (UMC) is a mixture of being rooted in the traditions of the Christian experience and being grounded in the here and now. For an LGBTQ youth, the church’s outlook can be frustrating and confusing. How a good pastor responds to the feelings of this youth can be a determining factor in the extent to which the relationship blooms and flourishes or wilts and dies. The church pastor is there to set the example and serve as the voice of the UMC. Therefore it is important to consider this case study in detail to discover what is at the heart of the youth’s feelings and how the youth might best prepare for whatever may come with the UMC.

The Particular Experience

In this case, an LGBTQ youth came to the UMC looking for guidance. The youth was anticipating a welcoming reception, comfort, support and acceptance. She felt that since God is love, she should be loved by God regardless of her sexual orientation. Yet her family has not approved of her lifestyle or of her sexual preferences. She feels alienated by them and wants to know where the church stands with regard to LGBTQ issues.

The pastor listened to the youth carefully and considerately. He then explained that while the UMC does not recognize LGBTQ orientations as legitimate from a Biblical standpoint, the church does not turn its back on anyone or turn anyone away. The pastor then invited the youth to come back so that they could study Scripture together and develop a better understanding of what God was calling her to do in her own life. The pastor did not condemn nor deny the stance of the UMC with regard to sexual orientation. Nor did the pastor seek to alienate or make the youth feel ashamed. The pastor displayed great empathy towards the young person, knowing full well how confusing the times are in which we live today.

To help guide the young person in her faith, the pastor thought that study of Scripture would be the best way to supply the person with the support needed. This would provide a kind of spiritual anchor—some spiritual orientation, so to speak, that seemed to be missing in the life of the young person. The young person came from a family that was well-versed in the traditions of the church but the family situation was also well-known to the pastor and he knew that the parents of the family were not very good at showing tolerance or empathy.

The youth, therefore, was not in an enviable situation: the family was rejecting her and she was hoping the church would at least appreciate her. The challenge here was to make her feel welcomed while also helping her to see how she could use sexuality as a gift from God meant to be used in the manner that God had planned—i.e., in monogamous heterosexual love. This would be a challenge because to deliver an outright attack and condemnation of her orientation would only turn her off and a rift would develop between herself and the church.

Because she was young, she was likely going through a great many physical changes and feeling a great deal of peer pressure, too, so it was important to understand more about her own social background while helping her to better understand the church’s position in a loving and gracious way. This was...

Now he had to set this plan in motion.
Interpretation

Indeed, the times today are confusing and the UMC has not done much to help clarify where we stand today. For instance, as Stoneking points out, “the first openly LGBTQ bishop in the United Methodist Church” was unanimously elected to the UMC’s episcopacy.[footnoteRef:2] What does this mean for the traditions of the church or of the message that is given to people in the Scriptures? On the one hand, it is understandable that the church wants to be accepting and tolerant. After all, there is a need in society for people to feel embraced as there is so much fighting and anger. Agnew describes how strain theory explains that people lash out in society and engage in destructive behavior when they feel themselves being pushed and pulled in various directions, feel themselves being negatively impacted by emotional and psychological assaults from their various environments,[footnoteRef:3] whether at school, at home or even in their church. Strain theory helps to show how young persons especially can become...…rootless, as Augustine was for so many years until he finally came to recognize God’s plan for himself. Augustine knows how hard it is to find oneself in this world and to make the right decision. The passions can be strong, so I would recommend engaging with Augustine for this young woman. He is so full of love for God in his writings that it may help her to see clearly what God wants for her. [6: Chris Ritter, Augustine, Luther and the Inward Curve, https://thegospelmatters.wordpress.com/2012/01/11/speaking-of-sin-luther-augustine-and-the-inward-curv/]

Action

Now it is time to act, and I myself would prepare first by engaging in prayer and asking God to help me guide this young person according to His plan. Then I would show the young person all the empathy and acceptance that I humanly could, never judging her or making her feel ashamed or unwelcomed because of her sexual orientation. All the while, however, I would be straight-forward and honest about how I see the church’s teachings on homosexuality and what I believe God’s plan to be with respects to human sexuality.

I would continue to meet with the young person as regularly as she would like to meet. I would not make her problems the topic of a sermon unless I noticed the situation to be particularly prevalent among the community. I would not want her anxiety to develop any further or worsen. I would however develop a sermon about patience and understanding and how important it is to never judge. I would show how Christ Himself ate with sinners and showed love towards them, how He forgave them their sins and urged them to go towards God. This would be the most beautiful and hopeful expression of my faith that I think I could give to the parish. If the young woman were in the parish during my sermon I would want to give an encouraging message of hope that she might hear and take to heart—something about how we are all in this life together and God has made it that way that we might rely on one another to better understand how He is guiding us towards Him using the gifts He has given us to enhance our own lives so that they may reflect…